1st time fight over $$$, if you have experience PLEASE HELP ME!!!?

Wow, he's in for a reality check. Babies are expensive...tell your grown baby to give up the games already. It's time to learn to be a man and take care of the family he's created.

I come from divorced parents who had the exact same problem. I'm also friends with a woman who's husband treats her the exact same way. The fact of the matter is, you are not in an equal relationship. If you both work then you need to share the responsibility. And his inability to do so will be the end of your relationship.

You need to express your feelings and let him know that what's going on in your household is not fair. You both bust your butt for the money you have and yet you are the only one who's taking care of anything. If he wants to use the utilities then he needs to start paying his fair share. Now you guys could divide it up in a way that he pays the rent and you pay all the utilities or you can split the rent and each take some utilities. Either way he needs to contribute more.

I understand that you want to make this right, which is why you need to sit down and let him know how you are feeling. You are being taken advantage of. There's no reason that he can't still have spending money and still help out with the finances. However, if he refuses to do so then you need to end the relationship because I can guarantee that this is just the beginning of the money arguements.

I wouldn't do well with the whole "two accounts" thing. If he lives in the same house as you and uses the same plumbing and electricity and cable (especially if he's jacking up those rates!) then he needs to be responsible for half.

Just as if you had one account and both your incomes were put into it, that money in the one account wouldn't be "his and mine" it would be ours. His half of the bills and your half of the bills combine to be "ours" no matter what either of you makes. If he has a child on the way and all he can think about is PS3, he's got another thing coming to him. He's gonna have to start shelling out lots of diaper and baby food money pretty soon. How's he gonna feel about that? I'd say it's time he grows up.

Another thing, if you pay out of your account for all the bills, what do you have leftover for you? If he's spending his money on whatever he wants, seems to me like he's just getting free rent at this point. Marriage/relationships are about two people, not one person having all the fun.

Are you married to him? Even before my husband and I got married, we had a joint checking account. Why don't you? Then he would see how much the bills are and when the bank account is low, BOTH of you are running out of money, not just you! It is a relationship, not a one sided thing. Tell him to grow up and that together you need to start saving money! Kids cost alot! You wont be able to work for atleast a couple of weeks after the baby, what then? Will you have the money to hold you over, or will you have to do without while you are at home recovering? The money for the ps3 would help in that situation! Money is a very common thing to fight about, everybody does it. Especially when the money is catergorized as MINE & YOURS! You are becoming parents soon and your money should become OURS! Good luck, it will get better. You could always suggest he get a second job?!

He's sounds like a selffish assho**. My fiance and I were going through the same scenario and still do at times, also I Just had a baby. He makes more than me, but would only give me a few dollars therefore I would use all my check and pay all the bills, thinking its okay, because if I neeeded gas, or anything he would pay. To my surprise he started acting funnny asking me what I did with all my money, why is he paying for gas, didn't I just get paid etc, etc.... It would make me angry and also hurt me because I felt I was alone...finally I just said f*ck it, I paid for a few bill such as utilities, gas...groceries and left the other bills unattended...when the cable got disconnected he'd say what happened and I would answer you didn't give me money to pay the bill, when he received deliquent notices for car note or cell phone became disconnected he would say what happened and I would answer, you didn't give me any money to pay the bill...he finally caught on and now just puts majority of his check in the joint and lets me manage the finances if he wants something extravagant we talk about it, I never tell him no..but I do tell him to wait until we are in a better position to afford it...he buys that.

Money can cause a lot of issues in a relationship. You should not be paying the bulk of the bills. He needs to step up and start paying for some of that. And PS3's are expensive and with a baby on the way you could be saving that money or spending it on the baby. You two need to sit down together and come up with a budget and in this budget make him pull his weight if he is not.

There cannot be one person in the relationship who is financially responsible with everything, because it will make the financially responsible person watch the other like a hawk with their spending. Watching them spend it on the stupidest things while you are sitting here paying the bills.

Do you guys keep seperate bank accounts? We have one account where both of our paychecks go. I pay the bills (as in the action of writing and mailing checks, etc) but with OUR money.

My husband and I have little tiffs over money a lot. I organize and budget the money in our house, so I sometimes find myself in the position to tell him he cannot have or do something. It is uncomfortable, but when done with patience it can be done.

If you need some compromise, let me pass on some wise words from Suze Orman: Sit down and do some math. Find out what 75% is of his paycheck and of yours. Have a joint account for that part of your money. All bills and necessities come from that fund. Then you each have 25% to do what you will. If he can afford toys with his leftover money, let him. If 75% is not enough to cover everything, up it to 80%.

The biggets issue here is not money, it is his attitude. If he will soon be raising a family he needs to step up to that role. I know good fathers that have PS3s, but they are a lower priority than their families.

Hindsight is always 20/20...You needed to decide how the finances were to be handled before marriage. But you need to do it now or you will be having this argument for the length of your relationship. Sit down with your husband and all your bills. Write down how much each of you bring home and decide who will be responsible for what. You have to take charge of your own finances too. You need to put back some of each of your paychecks (no matter how small), so you will have something in reserve in case an emergency arises or your child needs something. For a man about to have a baby, he sure is acting childish...I hope for you and your child's sake that it is just a phase!

Both of you get all the banks accoutns you have, all bills for a months ...all possible expenses etc and calculate you monthly expenditure and savings. Many peopel jus get sucked in the credit card game and are alwasy in soem sort of debt. With your current situation discuss hwo you are plannign to save for the futre?...buy a house? baby...its education etc?

Maybe as someoen said he needs to do a reality check...300$ xbox and naother 300 for ps2 wiht babay on the way..."HELLO" have you guys even palnned out what is it goignt o cost to set up teh nursery.

I think he still is in the hey we got money lets party mode...things change after marraige...she should know this...hence ALWAYS keep a track of expenditure..it takes 1 day every month to do it...but it sets ytou right.

Tell him he is acting like a kid .....does he not want to plan a future for his children? or rather be a kid himslef?

This is crap and he knows it so he needs to contribute his share to the bills. The money that you both make should be shared equally and apparently he is too immature too see this. I would leave him if he is that immature too only think of himself I would talk to your mom or dad or get some counseling this is out of hand and for especially for a baby on the way sooner or later you will get tired of this and leave him and I am sorry that you have to put up with this. He doesnt love you if he did he wouldnt treat you this way