Husband is pushing me away....?

The fact that he goes out drinking and doesn't come home for days on end should have been your first clue. The fact that he gathers phone number from other women should be another clue. He is not plugged into the marriage, that much is obvious. By putting up with his disappearances, his isolation once he is home, you are only condoning this behavior.

Woman up and find your backbone instead of retreating to sickness and whining to his best friend and strangers on the Internet. His behavior is appalling.

I've been there and done this!!

We didn't have "texting or computer then". My hubby was oil field too. I'm sorry, but no reason to be stressed about some company's rig!! That isn't so.

My hubby was cheating and I wouldn't have expected it either!! But he was and I'm sure yours is too.

I'd at least try a seperation, but I have a feeling, it will lead to divorce.

The only way to resolve this is to tell him how you feel. If he gets defensive, there is definitely something going on. It seems you have given him too much freedom to do whatever he wants. You may not want to admit it to yourself, but I think deep down you know he is probably cheating on you. You need to call him on it, and lay down some rules. When people get married, their lives are no longer just their own . They have a responsibility to their spouse. Your husband is not taking his husbandly responsibilities to you very seriously. And he will continue with this type of behavior as long as you let him. You can't continue this way. You must take a stand for what's right. If he truly loves you, he will see the error of his ways and change. If he doesn't change, you are most definitely better off without him. You have to ask yourself if you want to live this way for the next umpteen years, because as long as you allow him to do whatever he wants, he will happily stay married to you and do his own thing because he is having his cake and eating it too. You deserve better than that. I know it, and you know it too. It's better to be alone than to continue putting up with this kind of heartache and suffering. I think you know that is also true. Be true to yourself, not to a man who clearly has no respect for you, and who hasn't truly committed himself to you.

Sometimes a woman unknowingly becomes more of a roommate than a partner. Slowly but surely, a man may seize on that and start treating the woman as a lesser.

You can probably start pulling back. You are being passive now and when you do that, you give control of your life to others and people will take advantage of that.

Just start setting limits and express to him what you are saying here to us....

Best wishes and email me if you need to.

I sounds to me like he is already gone. You allowed him to do this. He is showing you and the kids no respect. I understand you do not want to get divorced but stay and you will eventually lose yourself and your kids.