how long did you wait until you got married?

It is very interesting to me that your previous relationships both ended at the 5 year mark. Did you know that scientists have isolated a hormone that cause men and women to be attracted to each other that fades round about the 5 year mark, sometimes earlier? If you are waiting for the perfect "attraction" physically for a relationship to work, you'll never find it. For a relationship to work you should be finding other things that will last and someone who is as willing as you to invest in the relationship.

There is no such thing as a "perfect" relationship or "perfect" guy. Trust your instinct about who you date. You've been dating long enough you should be able to recognize what you like and who you can trust. Don't wait for things to be perfect before you'll allow yourself to love someone fully. And don't keep waiting to make the "right" choice. there is no such thing as the "right" or "perfect" choice when it comes to who you love. When you do finally choose, choose someone who you like, love, respect, and with whom you are happy--someone you like spending time with--someone who shares similar values as you. You can't expect anything but that after 5 years "things change". Things always change. Just make sure you're with someone you don't mind changing with. Good luck to you.

Got married to my husband after knowing him for 2 months. Just had our 4 year anniversary and we're still doing great.

I waited about 6 months. I'm also 30.

I had a two year long relationship in college, and it went south.

But the thing I'm wondering about is how you view relationships. People are imperfect and people change. When you're in a relationship, you either have to accept imperfection and be flexible enough with (at least most kinds of) change to work through it, or you can't stay in the relationship. That's what marriage is about, IMO. And I love my fiancee, but I also know that we can work whatever it is out as we go forward. She's not perfect (and I'm sure she would readily admit that I'm not perfect, nor even perfect for her, either), but we know that and grow with it. Our relationship just keeps getting stronger because of it, I think.

Waiting 5 years to get married is just a self-fulfilling prophecy for destruction. Either commit to the person for life, and be willing to work through whatever comes (even if you're not particularly happy for relatively short periods) or not.

That's the best advice I can give. Maybe my perspective will change in 5 years, but well, ask again in 2013!

I don't think it's really much as to how LONG it took the two to see that they wanted to spend the rest of their life together. But mostly because it felt right. However most do take 4-6 years. maybe sooner but like I said it depends on the couple. In my opinion you worry too much, haha, cute but seriously.. you need to let things flow into place. Although I can see where you are coming from. But that was my best advise, ignore that negative voice and just have a great time with the guy and if you see flaws, and you really cared for him you can over pass it. I think that;'s when you know, you actually care for someone.

Ur to picky, people can't be perfect. I'm in a relationship of five years and we were in the edge of stop the relationship but is about having pacience, sacrifice some things, not be proud... if you keep being to picky every 5 years you'll change bf and in some point you wont be able to find another guy. But wait, it doesnt mean that you have to marry the first guy just to not being alone.

I strongly and seriously suggest you get counseling first. You have issues you must deal with first before you can put your trust into someone else. I am not trying to put you down, but your anxiety is obvious. Get to the root of that before making any decisions.

There is no time line and everyone is different. Do not base your life on what others have done. If you don't feel confident that you want to spend the rest of you life with someone than YOU are not ready.

Simple question--Have you had a serious and open discussion about this with your S.O.?

Five years is too long, that's the problem. You knew it wasn't right long before that, but didn't want to face it.

Then you wasted all the time after that, when you could have been noticing other guys.....who could very well have been Mr. Right.

Pay attention to your intuition and bail out as soon as you know he's not marriage material or you will be single forever. You need to date more people than 3 in 15 years!!!

the more experienced u get more ur in trouble .thats right.what i've learned is that no relation is perfect n no one is the perfect match out there. Just look around,many husbands n wifes have been lieying to each others about there past relations n things like that ..Thats y Marriage is not finding the right guy but finding a guy whom u can love n who loves u too.

So stop looking for the faults do look for the brighter side the happinesss that u'll find with it.......

My husband and I got engaged within 3 months of meeting but took 4 years to get married. After 8 years we are still going strong.

Dont feel bitter about this thing called marriage.I meet my hubby in 2002,got baby in 2003.Got married in 2005.Before we got maried we lots of ups and downs in our relationship.But even though,we preferred to get maried because we are inlove with each other.We dont care about the incoming problems in our relationship.All relationship will meet such problems.Its just how you both handle it.If you two are inlove...,then go for it! No such perfect relationship or marriage!

Break youself of looking for something wrong, because if you don't find something, you will create something. If you are genuine love, nurture it. There will be problems but that is just life. Horrible of you to think that if it goes sour. It just went sour with that thought that. Be happy and love as much as possible. Have faith.