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Where's the common sense?

Okay... having been on Yahoo Answers for a while... it seems like the basics of common sense have long-since left town.

The basic rules we lived by 20 years ago as a matter of "good form" and being "moral" have their real basis in common sense... forget about religious indoctrination!

For example, we girls knew not to give up "the whole enchilada" unless we had a solid commitment...

We didn't "put out" on a date... it was only after the guy had earned our trust, and we had a serious ring on our finger, and everyone knew we were an item. We were a lot pickier back then!

We didn't think about beginning to move in with our guys unless it was maybe a month away from our wedding and the invitations had long been sent. That was considered "setting up housekeeping".

We darn sure didn't make babies with a guy we were just living with.

We didn't go to parties specifically to get drunk.

We understood that the stakes were higher for mistakes we made early on as young adults just starting out... Sleep around and you don't stand a chance of marrying a good guy. Marry the wrong guy and you wind up rearing any kids by yourself.

The behaviors that are apparently so common here on Yahoo Answers were reserved for the parentally-abandoned sluts and low-lifes that never had any real social training.

Are the parents out there completely AWOL?

What do the kids think they are avoiding by moving in together and making babies without getting the marriage license?

In most states, it you cohabit for a year, you are considered "common law married"... I know too many people who got stuck with a lot of debts because of shacking-up with someone and one often has to file for divorce just to get that other person off your credit record and legally get them to take at least half of the debts. Buying real estate is certainly a mistake without that marriage certificate.

Guys... having babies with someone you "live with" doesn't get you out of child support payments. If you are living with a girl and are "getting some" you are playing against the odds of her fertility. Get ready to have your wages garnished for child support for the next 18 years.

Girls, as much as you want to move out of your parents' house and have independence, you can't expect to do it logically by moving in with a guy. He will likely take advantage of the full benefits of a wife that you provide without the strings attached, and will certainly make use of your body. He may be happy for a while after you announce your pregnancy, but when the responsibility sets in and he starts feeling enslaved, you will wind up rearing the kids by yourself. Life is a lot harder when you are starting out with few job skills and little work experience, AND having to worry about supporting both yourself and your kids. Like I said, the stakes for mistakes are higher.

Having a family without marriage will leave the family in a serious financial bind if they cannot collect life insurance for the parent that has died in an accident... that "piece of paper" has value in protection!

A civil marriage ceremony at the courthouse followed by a nice little cake and punch reception does not take any real time or expense. If you can't get your partner to that altar, then you know this isn't someone you give it up to.

5 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    And then you do have the right person at a young age! I'm am so tired of all the adults who think just because they are older they know everything! Yes giving the fact that you have been through a lot more then we younger people have you might know somethings more then we do...but not all! I have had a rough life! I am not completely book smart but I'll have you know that I graduated with Honors. I am more so street smart in which most adults aren't! Being around things that young girls shouldn't be around I have learn tons. And I'll put all that on my mom! I am in a relationship now with someone I started to date in my Junior year in high school! I moved in with him when we had only be together for six months. And I know that's not good...but yet again I give thanks to my dad for that one! We have been together over a year and six months now and I do have a ring! It might only be a promise ring but I know that there is meaning behind it! My man is very hard working and will do anything for me. I do work too but all I do right now is baby-sit for his little cousin that lives with us because no-one else in her family will watch her! So I have taken on the responsibility for this little girl who is not mine. She has even called me her mom before. And I only get $40 a week for watching her! That's bull crap! I also sit for this other women how has two kids and I get $200 a week for them! I know that it doesn't do to much but it helps. I make more then my boyfriend does most of then time because he has taxes! We are curently trying to have a baby! I have applyed to many different places but I cant start until like the 25th of this month because of the kids I look after. I take care of my bills and i take care of my business. I stay to myself most of the time. Yet again I put me growing up so freaking fast upon my lovely ADULT parents who yet again think that they know everything.

    God Bless.

    Source(s): I am me!
  • 6 years ago

    Same

  • Sooo true and sooo sad.

  • Anonymous
    5 years ago

    good points.

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    AMEN TOO THAT

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