found a girls number in his call log!?

Uh oh, he's in deep shìt now!

I know you are suspicious because you care about him and want the truth, but if you HAVE to push for honesty then he isn't worth too much of your time. If he cared, he'd be open. So either trust that he's being open and honest with you, or don't. He cheated once so you probably won't trust him again. You will probably confront him about it, and if you turn out being wrong then it will make things worse. If you turn out being right things are already bad, so just take some time out for yourself and relax. Maybe snoop some more when you get the chance haha. Hope things work out.

This new system of " gaining your trust back" is not working. You do not trust him- period. You cannot " be friends" with someone who you are in love with. You cannot " take things slow" with a friend.. it doesnt make sense. You really have to sit down and think about what it is you want.. and be true to yourself. I know it sound hard.. but the way you are handling things now is not working.Bri could be an old friend he ran into.. but technically if you guys are " friends" it COULD be someone new he met-- and you really cant say anything about it.. b/c you are just " friends". Something to think about.

Trust is very hard to get back in a relationship. Once its gone, normally it is gone for good. Even if you do get it back there will always be some level of mistrust. You have a very long road ahead of you and based on his response "it sounds good on paper but it wouldnt work" it doesn't sound like he wants to put in the effort he needs to. I don't know him or you, maybe you can be one of the rare couples that makes it through this, but in my experience it is rare. I know one couple that has, but even they are finding it difficult at times and its stressful for both of them.

Find out who Bri is before you jump to any conclusions, but step lightly on this and don't be fooled by him. He lied once so who is to say he won't lie again?

I'm surprised by some of these answers...did you all miss the part of "he cheated"??? No she shouldn't be snooping, but can you really blame her? She wouldn't feel like she needed to snoop if the dumb **** wouldn't have given her a reason to. If he wants to be with her then he is going to have to deal with the mess he made and regain her trust...thats how it works. That means putting up with her snooping through his phone every now and then, asking questions like "who is Bri," etc. If he has nothing to hide then he shouldn't be upset by her snooping as this is part of the process of regaining trust. In my experience, the guys that get pissed about the snooping are the guys that have something to hide...so snoop away because the only way you'll find out is on your own, he isn't going to come out and say, "yeah I'm still cheating on you."

If you have to go through his phone to see if he is talking to someone else that's showing that you dont' trust him at all and if you can't trust him then what's the use of wasting your time with him. But real talk I don't think going through a guy's phone is the right approach. He should be allowed to have girl friends just as your allowed to have guy friends, what numbers would he find if he went through your call log?

Listen, your really beating yourself up for no reason. By the way it sounds, hes just being an aasshole if your a concerned girlfriend. who just wants to know your relationship is still genuine. There is nothing wrong with that.

However, if you continue to bring up the subject it might get him aggrivated (I say "might" becuase he may or may not, i dont know him) which could terminate your relationship. I suggest just watching him when your in public or together, if his mind is on other things then bring it up.

Most importantly: just relax. If you keep up this paranoid state, you will fall into a depression wich kinda sux : /.

So.... Go outside! go for a walk! go shopping! Call him and say "i love you" and maybe eat some poptarts cause they are sooooo good.

Goodluck - John =)

it could be anything from the number to the fin. aid lady at his college to his lover. Go with your gut feeling. Maybe if you could get ahold of his phone again you could save the number under something else in your phone and then call that number from a friends phone and maybe say oh! I'm sorry, I must have the wrong number. Ask if you can talk to accounting or something so it won't look suspicious.

Well, if the "taking space" is primarily your decision, don't be surprised if he at least talks to potential dates. I have been in this position where the girl I really want wants to "take space" and in the end have started looking at other girls because I resent her not wanting to be with me. The resentment then basically ended up encouraging me to look to others for companionship.

You can't "take space" and then expect to know everything he is doing, either you are together or your not. If you're not, then he's right, you can't keep tabs on what each other is doing.

You shouldn't have looked at his call log.

Pretend like you didn't.

If he finds out your chances of getting back together will decrease.

He'll think you're getting in to that stalking stage and will push you away.

It may be a friend that he is talking to about your relationship.

It sounds to me like he is the one that freaked a little when you mentioned seeing other people.

If he cheated, then he'll cheat again. It's his personality trait, he doesn't understand loyalty or appreciate the bond you guys share. I'm tired of seeing girls go through this. I would never cheat on my girl, It's because I respect her and Appreciate everything we share. Clearly your man does not, stop wasting your time and find a man who respects you.

You want him to be honest so you have to be honest too. Tell him you snooped and what you found.

A relationship is honesty on BOTH SIDES...not just his.

It seems there is distrust on both sides of this relationship...and if you two want to be friends and work things out...then you have to stop being dishonest and playing games with him too.

People here can trash him for his betrayal of you and it is wrong..don't get me wrong...but you two were in trouble before that...and lack of honesty on BOTH sides and playing games is part of it.