Advice from parents of gay children..?

First of all, I'm gay and 15. And I just want to say that your acceptance of your son is very important to him. It's good that you are cool about it. My parents don't know that I'm gay, but if they did and were ok with it, I wouldn't want them to be protective of me. I want to be treated like everyone else. I would like to hear things like "We're so proud of you" and "We love you." Even if he acts like he doesn't care when you say these things, believe me, he does care and he probably wants to hear them. Also, I advise you to allow both sons to have sleepovers with whatever gender they want. It's not alright to tell one son to have girls over while the other one can't. Your straight son might take offense to this, and direct his anger toward your gay son (homophobia). So anyway, I would say to treat both sons equally. Again, kudos for your open-mindedness! =)

Wow!! An understanding parent. Congratulations!! I definitely would not tell anyone about his sexual preferences since I am sure he told you in confidence, and it is HIS decision as to whether he wants others to know.

I would suggest that you treat both of your sons the same, regardless of their sexual preferences. I assume you are at home with them at night. I am sure you would let your oldest son have other boys stay over too. Otherwise you may end up alienating them later on. Whatever you do don't treat your gay son like a baby! Just be the same parent you were before he told you he was gay.

Lots of luck--not that you will need it. I think your acceptance is great. Understanding parents are hard to come by these days.

I'm glad that your son felt that he could tell you that he's gay at the age of 14 years old. My mom asked me if I were gay at 14 and I denied it. Then I knew people already suspected me of being gay and I felt that the majority of people didn't like me because I was gay and some people who I thought were cool would even make comments about gay people. This was during the 90's and I guess times are changing at a lot has happen since I was a teenager. You don't need to tell people that you're son is gay. He is 14 and needs time to grow into himself. He can tell anyone that he wants to know. You shouldn't feel ashamed at all.

By the way you sounds like an awesome parent.

Im sure many of the teens answering this question would have loved their parents to react the same way as you did.

Im 16 (not a parent, sorry but I think this will help) and coming from my knowlegde and experience.. I think you should just go with the flow... thes a cliche but its honest.

People son enought will figure out you sons gay especially if he shows it with his clothes etc..

I think it's really great what you've done for him so far

I think that all gay children wish they had parents like you.

: ]

I don't think that you should tell people about this. Ask your son about what he would like you to do. I am 17 and gay and closeted (my family does not know), but when I do come out I do not want them to tell others--I will tell those who I feel need to know in due time.

I suggest that you talk to him about this, and see if he would like you to tell people (family, friends) that he is gay or not, and if someone asks you if he is gay whether or not he would like you to tell them yes or no.

Good for you for being a great dad :D I wish I could say the same about my father.

First off, props to you for accepting your son for the person he is, unlike most parents that come here.

Anyways, I would wait until he's, say, 24 or so to say he's gay to people.

If he isn't being made fun of for wearing what he wears, if it ain't broke, don't fix it.

For making him feel welcome, just say you love him whenever. Even if it'll embarass them. ;D

i think u accepting him its already alot, and i think hes really happy for having such a cool mom like u

and i also dont see why u need to tell people hes gay, u dont go tell people your older son is straight do u?

I am gay and I applaude your openness. but dont be too open. place the same restrictions on all your sons equally. if your straight son cant have girls in his room with the door closed then your gay son shouldnt have boys in the same scenario.

You should not tell anyone about his sexuality else unless they ask directly because its noones business but his. If he wants anyone to know he can tell them.

this is a very intimate detail and really doesnt belong out there listed as hobbies along with fishing and cycling.

it is counter productive to the professional and other nonsexual relationships he will want to cultivate, to have this reputation precede him wherever he goes. If you want to talk to him about something then you should warn him about that.

He may still make the decision to be OUT but you should tell him that before he finishes school and heads out into the working world he may want to take a new position on that. as you know you shed most of you school attachments in the first year after you graduate, keeping only your closest friends . Its a fresh start that everyone needs and deserves and you should discourage him from painting himself into a corner with an excessively open gayness.

To empower your son more, let him be the one in control of just how out he wants to be to everyone. That is one of the fundamental things that all gay people have to learn - it's safe to be out in some circumstances, uncomfortable to be out in others, and downright dangerous to be out in still others.