what do you think of my essay?

This is a great start! Everyone else made good constructive comments on how to improve your essay.

Remember that your first paragraph should contain the main point of your essay. I think this is why you're having trouble, because you don't know what point it is that you're trying to make.

Since your essay seems to discuss the differences between science and religion in respect to the origins of man, I think one avenue you could take would be to compare the source of conflict between two current theories: Evolution versus Creationism, and then explain why you believe in one of the theories over the other.

Do you know what creationism is? Creationism is an alternative theory that was put forth by religious groups who rejected Darwin's theory of evolution because it conflicted with their spiritual beliefs on how and who created the universe. The definition of Creationism is: God created the universe and all living things.

But all religious groups (including Buddhism, Hinduism and others) have a belief as to how the universe was created and the origins of man. The difference is that Creationism attempts to compete with science on science's own level, as a way of rejecting Evolution.

The reason why it can't succeed on the same playing field as Evolution is that it refuses to use scientific methodology. So though many people refuse to accept Darwin's Theory of Evolution, scientists reject Creationism as a valid theory because it is not based on the scientific method. Thus it is considered a pseudoscience.

So religion and science have both come up with theories as to the origin of man. One is based on the scientific method (studying DNA and fossils) while the other is based on the bible and faith.

Once you think about those two theories, now you can decide for yourself why you believe in one of the theories over the other. Then explain why you chose it. Personally I think Creationism is just plain stupid, but don't put that in your essay :)

Hope that helps!

I've made syntactic and grammatical corrections to the extent possible. I don't understand your last paragraph, and I don't think that it's factually correct. For instance, homo sapien did not evolve from apes. Both man and apes evolved from a common ancestor. Your essay still needs more revisions, but I've done what I can do.

Was Charles Darwin correct in his theory of evolution or were we all created by the hand of a superior god?

Darwin's theory was that human life began, not from god, but through millennia of adaptations beginning with an ancient common ancestor of homo sapiens and apes. During Darwin’s life, most people believed very strongly that god created the Earth and everything that walked upon it. Nowadays a significant majority of people take a more scientific approach. Scientists have studied monkeys closely and have determined that we share 98.5% of our DNA with chimpanzees. But who is correct about the theory of evolution: Darwinists or creationists?

What is evolution? Evolution is the process that causes plant and animal life to evolve and adapt to the changes in their environment. Evolution takes place over millions of years and will continue over millions of years. Life on earth will most definitely never stop changing, because it must change to adapt to the changes in the world.

Take the fact that we are Homo sapiens, and Homo sapiens evolved from Neandertalensis, before was Homo erectus, and before them was the Homo habilis and before was Australopithecus, but was before the Australopithecus what was there? Was it just apes, so that would have to prove the point that we did evolve from apes.

From the beginning and reading down:

1. Question if there's a third possibility to add interest.

2. Darwin's theory involved all life, not just humans.

3. "...not all human life" - begs the question about those humans not included in your statement.

4. Take out "...so very strongly..."

5. Change "...environment that they live in"

6. Add, "Evolution is a process, not an event."

7. I'm not sure you can say "...The world will most definitely never stop growing..." Is it really growing?

8. Does the world HAVE to adapt to the way WE live or does nature dictate a response to what WE do to the planet and if it does, does that guarantee it'll 'adapt' in a positive way?

9. How we take the world for granted is another whole subject of its own.

Next paragraph - state that the CURRENT BELIEF is that '...we evolved from...' because with each new discovery, scientific theories change.

A good ending would be to question where the first ape came from.

Expand on topics you've already introduced.

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It's a good start.