Letting your child cry it out at bedtime?

I have done both and learned real fast what type of child I would end up with if I gave in to his every demand. My son is 10 months and very smart. he knows exactly what to do to get what he wants. So I just made the decision that I was not going to raise a brat. He knows he has a routine and that when its time for bed then its time for bed. He doesn't always welcome it with open arms, but eventually he gets the idea and goes to sleep. He is a very bright and happy baby and I don't feel one bit guilty about it. As for the candy my son doesn't even get juice so candy is out of the question~crying or not

If your child is crying themselves to sleep you should be sitting there with them. Do not give in, do not let them out of the bed but don't abandon them either. If you sit with them for a few weeks they will become comfortable with the situation and should start doing better after a little time has passed. If your child is crying because they want candy for dinner then they need a time out. When they get hungry enough they'll eat a nutritios meal. If my kid was so hooked on candy that they cried when they couldn't have it I would throw it all away and start introducing yummy healthy snacks. However, I am not in your home and do not know the full situation on that front. Do not allow your child to using crying a s a method of control or manipulation. The bed time thing may just be a stress thing for your child, but other than that I would start using time outs whenever your child start crying, even in public dear. Don't be loud, don't be angry, just be firm. Your child will soon learn that this behaviour will not have the desired effect. Good Luck!

I am not. How tired are they before they go to bed. I found that I cut TV, computer, or anything that is a stimulate at least an hour before bed. I would read to my kids every night with a talk after what we read. I love bed time for them. I want to make it a calm experience.

Put a stop to the asking for candy at supper. Be firm and tell them no. Your job is to take these children and model behavior that will train them to be successful adults. Children will try all angles to work on wearing you down and you can fall fail to giving in to the occasional unhealthy request, your human. You are not doing yourself or the child any favors getting into poor eating habits just because you are not taking your job as a parent seriously or your tired. think about how you would like to be handled. Listening to your children is a skill, let them explain why they want to do that action that they want. This gives you an opportunity to reason with them and explain why the choice is good or not good for them, I avoid the word bad.

There is no bad child behavior just bad parenting that has created that behavior.

All studies show that children thrive on boundaries that are clear and you as a parent must always meet the needs of the child's changing needs. I love to watch Nanny 911. I find really great tips to employ in my family. Good Luck!

Well if you said no candy, then it should stay no candy. Give in and unfortunately they will want, and expect, more next time, and the crying will get louder and longer. Try not to argue with them, just say no, and try (I know its hard) to ignore the tantrums and look away. When the crying stops don't discuss it but continue with some other discussion. If you can hold out and be strong you'll be doing yourself, and your child, a really big favour. Ps. A book called Toddler Taming by Tony Attwood can give you some great ideas and lots of encouragement. Good luck!

Edit - This debate seems to have forgotten, along the ways, that crying is normal for children, tantrums are normal, and testing the boundaries (demanding candy) are also quite normal. Letting a little frustration and anger out cannot be harmful for a young child - It's just totally normal behaviour. It's really up to the parent if they allow their lives to be ruled by a toddler or not. If they give in then they are just providing fuel for fodder.

For the bedtime issue. Check that the child is comfortable, feeling well, has been fed enough and is in clean bedding and diapers etc..before deciding whether they are just crying because they don't want to go to bed. I would let them cry a little, then check on them again...You can tell by the type of crying usually what's upsetting your child. If they are in a room on their own maybe play them a little soft music or have a comfort sound that they like. If you are certain that there is nothing wrong with them, then let them cry it out. You don't want to teach rewards for bad behaviour.

The candy issue is a no-brainer. you say no. they cry. tough. You are responsible for their well being. Your life experience is higher, you know what is best. Your decisions are final.

Most who are against CIO, like myself, are against it while the child is an infant. There is a huge difference between letting an infant child CIO and a 4 or 6 y/o CIO.

I would not give in to my four year old crying for candy for supper. She could sit down peacefully with the rest of us and eat her dinner, or she could cry in her room until we are done. A 4 or 6 y/o is capable of manipulation, whereas an infant is not, and should be shown that you are going to reasonably stand your ground.

by no ability to the billionth skill. it is baby abuse. You pop a nerve pill, make double expresso and not sleep all night with the squalling youngster. bags under your eyes? Waaa, suck it up andpersistent on, the only stable looking mothers are the loopy chicks interior the celebrity international and prosperous trickens...reason they have the money to hire NANNY to work out TO THE BRAT jointly as THEY SLEEP AND circulate to THE SPA. the rest human beings suck it up andpersistent on, there is not any decision. i comprehend I sound like a sarcastic nut while i propose all dad and mom with undesirable or whiny childrens to work out a psychiatric healthcare expert and get nerve meds, yet i'm being for actual. it is truly shown that a crying toddler, somewhat one crying for no reason, can strengthen an grownup's blood tension via a minimum of 10-20 factors diastolic, and 5-10 factors systolic quickly. it may additionally rattle your nerves worse than being shelled and mortared in strive against if the crying is undesirable adequate. So, you have 3 strategies: proceed on as you're, and learn how to handle his moods and whims. seek for help from skilled medical workers. Get a sitter some situations a week for sanity applications.

I have two kids with two very different persoanlities. The oldest one (now 10 years) when she was a baby I could let her cry herself to sleep, she would cry and whimper at the most 20 minutes usually not even that and then go to sleep.

My baby (8 months) I can't she will scream and cry till she makes herself throw up and won't stop even after an hour. Its a personality thing with them.

If the baby would stop about 30 mins or so I would let her cry but I fell it is cruel to let her throw up and all. Plus my oldest needs to sleep for school and all and can't get any rest with a screaming baby.

I believe in letting them cry it out. If you run to their every whim it creates codependency issues and yes it can develop that early in life. A baby or child needs to be taught to not depend solely on the parent and there is no harm in letting them cry as long as they are fed changed and not in any physical pain such as being ill. I have four very independent children that go to bed when they are supposed to. Why because since they were babies they have been taught that crying gets you nowhere!

Again the candy issue goes hand in hand with giving in. If you start the pattern early of no means no and stick to it then you shouldn't have many problems. Of coarse they are kids but mine know that even a small sign of complaint it worsens their chances of getting what they want.

Bottom line don't give in with either circumstance

Well you basically have two seperate situations. The first one after the baby isn't needing to eat at night you have to get them into a routine of soothing themselves to sleep. We did the Ferber method with two of our kids and they were sleeping all the way through the night within a week.

The second scenario is a kid throwing a temper tantrum and if you give in to them then guess who is the boss? Not the parent. Basically it just teaches the child that if they cry enough they will get what they want.