I'm still inlove with a guy that I met 17 yrs ago. I haven't seen him in 13 yrs.When we were in a relationship?

Question

I wasn't a born-again christian like I am now. He hurt me and our relationship was very brief. After all these years, my love for him has just grown. I've also been praying that somehow someway we will be together.  Look, I have tried everything I can to get him off my mind but nothing is working. We haven't communicated since we last saw each that 13 years ago. I just got this idea that I should aNONYMOUSLY send him something for Valentine's Day..maybe flowers, and a religious book (or maybe something else). I don't want him to know its from me. I just want to tourch his heart. Is this a good idea?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I don't know. I just identify with your situation a lot. I have not seen my great love in 25 years and still think of him almost everyday. We were only platonic friends because there was not enough time to take it further. I decided that I finally had to let it go. The truth is most of it was a fantasy I had built up in my mind. I started to think that trying to open that door again would only lead to bitter disappointment. So I can understand your feelings. I am just not sure that it is healthy for you. Its kind of like forever living in the past. That's the only reason I think it may not be a good idea. If you do anything at least identify yourself so you can begin anew or find out that its over for him and move on. Good luck!

Anonymous · Answer

You aren't in love with him; you are in love with a memory. It's time to move on. Go out and meet someone new; there are a lot of fish in the sea!

EDIT: btw, the anonymous gift idea? Bad idea. It's not going to do anything except make him worry he has a stalker.

Mogollon Dude · Answer

You do not state how he hurt you . With out this knowledge I can not give any farther advice . For you could be looking at getting back in to a demeaning relationship . One of constant hurt and pain .

Truth · Answer

In 13 years both of you have grown in different directions.

You aren't in love with him but with an idealized version of how he used to be.  Leave it alone.  It can only hurt you both.

pab · Answer

You really need to get over it.  It was over a decade ago.

You don't love him anyway...you love a false image you have put into your mind that isn't really what it was like anyway.

If this feeling persists, I would suggest getting some help.

Bob · Answer

" I just want to tourch his heart."

Perhaps a Freudian slip: "I just want to torch his heart???"

Zero With Everything · Answer

Pick up the phone and call him or move on.

Anonymous · Answer

"Tourch his heart"? light it up and burn it to a crisp, that sound like fun to me, burn baby burn!!!!

Anonymous · Answer

just forget it and move on with someone else....just cherish the memories...see friends...this is RH

Anonymous · Answer

"I just want to tourch his heart."

Hilarious.

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I'm still inlove with a guy that I met 17 yrs ago. I haven't seen him in 13 yrs.When we were in a relationship?

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