Spiritually speaking, how did you measure up on the worst day of your life?

I had read most of the question before I glanced over to see who was writing it. I gasped when I saw it was you. I just spoke to you and you were very kind. I told you that I only contacted you because of what was written on your profile about your wife and child. I am so sorry. I had no way of knowing the bad timing. I pray that God will comfort you and help you and your family. He has helped my husband and me through so many difficult times in our marriage. God bless you and I will keep you in my prayers.

First and foremost ... I wish you well however it may work out.

This worst day .... So many to choose from ... most included some sort of unexpected death, one almost included my own self inflicted. But the truth is looking back, I got through them all with the help of friends and family. Not to mention my own will to never give up ... ever !

My wife and I have been on a roller coaster over the last 15 years. Most of that time it has been fantastic however during that time we did separate twice. I think we now both realize that we may not be destined to be with each other for the rest of our lives.

We are more like best friends with benefits then husband and wife. We have two young kids (10 and 11) and I'm hoping we can hold it together long enough for them to not have to grow up in a broken home.

I will say that I do love her and always will, and I believe she feels the same about me. I hope that you and your wife can maintain some level of decency for your son, but I know it gets difficult as the pressure builds.

Just remember whatever decision you make, its the right one and exactly how it is suppose to work out ...

Good luck man ... we're all hoping for the best for you ...

The worst day of my life was when a guy I was living with went to seek medical attention for the flu and was sent home in a coffin. He was 25 at the time. I didn't eat for nearly a week, I chained smoked for the first week, and after that little by little I started to unclench a little.

I'm sorry to hear about your situation, but hopefully the counseling with help. Just the fact that she's willing to go is a big deal. Many times people will refuse counseling. Keep your chin up, this isn't over yet.

I've had so many worst days that rather than count them, I count the good days, the "gold" as a friend once said. How did I measure up? Well, I'm my own worst enemy, I don't think I measure up at all. But when the chips are down, and I don't know where else TO go or to do, and I'm just lost... God is where I go. I'm not one of those super religious God spouters... but I do believe. I learned a long time ago that when I have nothing, in him I have something, something that gives me something to hold on to. It's not easy for me to go to him with my problems, it's not easy to lay it all out before him. It takes admitting that I can't do it anymore by myself and I hate that. But I always feel better.

I'm sorry about your marriage. Look at the positive; she didn't say she wanted a divorce. Hope things turn around for you. Will definitely say a prayer for you.

love and light

It can slightly alter your perception of the world. Why anyone would want to confuse their perceptions of the world is a puzzlement, to say the least. However, for the most part, its effect most of the time is more due to our expectations than anything it actually does. However, it is also true that in a smaller but not insignificant number of cases, it causes very serious disturbances in perceptions. I've worked in psychiatric care for thirty five years, and we have cared for several people who became psychotic after smoking one or two joints. For them, it was a very dangerous drug indeed. It had an effect somewhat like the effect PCP has on a lot more folks. I don't approve of recreational drug use in general. I prefer to deal with the world while still posessing a full deck, or at least as close as I can get to that state. THC, the active ingredient in Cannabis, is very effective in treating a number of ailments, and I think the Federal Government needs to put a full stop to its stupid efforts to control MDs prescribing THC, regardless in what medium. We allow the use of morphine, and god knows it's far more dangerous. It has to be tightly controlled, and I wouldn't object to some controls for THC, but just mindlessly resisting its use is stupid, mean-spirited and cruel.

All things considered, I think I handled it pretty well. It took over a year before I managed to pull everything in my life back together though and I'm sure that I've still got some mental scarring. As I'm sure you can tell, I still don't like to talk about it.

I'm sorry to hear that Rev. I hope things work out.

Edit: after giving this a lot more thought I've decided that while I faced the day reaonably well, i didn't do so good in the weeks and months that followed.

Edit#2: I did get through it eventually. I know the feeling you're describing.

About knee high - I spent most of the day with my head in my hands....after that? one breath at a time - for about three years. then somewhere along the way I started breathing on my own, without conscious effort, until I began to actually live again as opposed to barely surviving.

It is good you are both willing and able to try counseling. I hope you find the answer through there. If nothing else - you suck it up for the kid.....having been where you are now, I'm sorry. My heart aches for you. May you measure up much better than I did.

I have trouble with this because I tend to rationalize everything as being positive in some aspect. However, I'm not even going to pretend to know what you're going through.

But I will say that from what I've seen on here, you are strong and will not let this effect you in the long term. If you're going to look for a silver cloud, it's the counselling. She's at least willing to make it work and that is something that a lot of individuals are not willing to attempt.

I hope this works out for you, because I know how much you love your family.

If you love each other it can work out with work. Go to the counselor and keep an open mind- be willing to make changes.

If she respected you enough to wait for a time when it would be easier on you then she probably still cares enough to invest herself into counseling with you. In my experience problems start when communication deteriorates and one or both parties become unwilling to make changes for the sake of the other.

You are an intelligent man, she is an intelligent woman and you both care about each other. You also have a child in common. This all amounts to hope and a good chance for things to work out.

I wish you fortitude in the hard row you have ahead of you to hoe.

I was walked out on, on my first anniversary, I told him we should go to counseling he agreed and never came back.. A lot was hidden from me and a lot of people did not tell me the truth or even speak to me , I still do not know what happened. I wish I would have at least been told the truth. I still do not know. I was left and sometimes still wonder. I do hope that things work out better for you though.