Mental abuse in a relationship?

Sweetie, I am sorry but you cannot fix or change this or him. HE is the one with the problem. You have done nothing wrong. He is blaming you for things to make himself feel better and to make you feel bad. You do not deserve this, just like no one else does. I know you love him, but do you deserve to be treated this way? What is going on is a cycle of abuse. It is good for awhile, but it comes back (like a circle, a cycle).

I was in a relationship just like this. After many years of his mental, verbal, and emotional abuse, we found out that he had not only ADHD but also bi-polar disorder. He was put on some medication which kind of helped, but not quite enough. In time, we divorced and went our separate ways. He has since got on the correct medications, had therapy, and totally changed as a person (and we are back together).

It will be up to you to decide what to do here. You can tell him that you aren't going to take this from him any longer (don't do it while he is in his manic moods, tho, or he won't remember, will get quite defensive, and will only blame you). Once this is done, you must have a plan of what you will do if he doesn't listen (get yourself some help from a support group, leave him, or whatever you choose). You can let him know that you will help him to get some help (which will only work if he admits that he has a problem); however, if he won't admit that there is a problem, there won't be anything that you can do to help him. Like I said, you cannot change him, only try to help him.

One thing I learned to do when my boyfriend has his manic moods is to walk away or ignore him and laugh it off. I know that he doesn't mean it personally towards me. It is just one of his moods, which will pass in time. I had to get a thick skin in order to do this. Believe me, it was not an easy task to do, but I did it. It has kept me sane and in tact over the years. I no longer feel as if I am walking on eggshells like I did before (like you do now).

Please contact me at pumpkin3536@hotmail.com if you want to chat about this. Yvette

Damn my friend. You said it exactly like I am feeling it right now. My husband is doing the same thing to me. No your not crazy and its not your fault that you have to try to defend yourself which makes it appear that its your fault in his opinion. But like Azz holes we all have them so who died and made him God. We are so desperate for love that we allow men to do us like this because we want them to love us as much as we love them. They won't. Yes, you are being verbally and mentally abused by him. Don't stay in a relationship where you are made to cry because what happens is it will kill the love you have inside of you. You deserve better and so do I. I am still in it. I even accepted his two kids from his previous marriage and he tells me that its my job. He is very mean and everything I say he turns into something bad. I try to not talk at all to prevent an argument. How long can we go on like this. I don't know. Right now, he's the bread winner and I have no income, or I would be gone. I am empowering myself educationally and trying to see where I can go. Possibly live with some of my grown children. I know mine will end in divorce. SEE THE REAL TRUTH IS HE IS BIPOLAR AND/OR SCHIZOPHRENIC. HE HAS A REAL MENTAL ISSUE THAT HE REFUSES TO ACCEPT. HE'S NICE TO EVERYONE BUT ME. I REALLY HATE HIM AND WILL BE GLAD WHEN I CAN GET OFF THE EGG SHELLS TOO. Divorce will be just great, and he can raise his 2 spoiled little liars by himself. I am like 13 years younger than he is. You'd think his old azz would be glad to have someone as loving, caring and obedient, yes I said obedient. But no, he prefers to by a tyrant Azz whole. Good Luck. Your not alone. Start to prepare yourself for a departure. Its nothing you can do because your not the problem. HE IS. You can not fix him, but you can escape the mental abuse once you get yourself together. If your like me, I almost forgot what it feels like to be loved. I deserve better. May we both get the strength to do what is best for each. For me, it is to leave. Hopefully, you can get him into therapy or see a psychiatrist but don't bet on it. Good Luck my friend. Your question has helped me too.

To me psychological abuse is worse than actual abuse.With actual abuse yours harm's are healed in a short volume of time,yet regrettably with psychological abuse your harm's can some years to heal.

if anything he says or does makes you feel bad about yourself and causes you pain on a regular basis..thats abuse. you can try talking to him about it. but if you are serious about his behaviour towards you stopping or changing then be prepared to leave him. if not then your other choice is to stay in a emotionally abusive relationship. you can ask you local abuse centre for more info on what emotional abuse is or look for more info online. good luck :)

yes that is an mentally abusive relationship. tell him about this and get couples counsleing or have him seek some help. if he dosnt then get out untill he can treat u better.

Sounds unhealthy to me. You cannot change him. Like someone said - stand up for yourself or leave! Don't wait for him to change - it just gets worse when married

stand up for yourself...or get out.

GET OUT!!!!!