Wedding party troubles... younger girls?

Question

I haven't had a close female friend since my sophomore year of college (I'm 27). My sisters are both over 40, and not really interested, so I'm planning on asking my nieces to be my bridesmaids. The oldest is 18, next is 14, then 10. Here's the trouble: I love, but can't stand the 10 year old, but I know that if I leave her out, she'll feel rejected by our family, once again. She's my brother's daughter, and he didn't marry her mom, in fact, he refused to believe that she was his until she was a year old. Long story short, she needs to be included, but I just can't fathom having her as a bridesmaid at all (she's a total spaz). I still plan to put her in a matching dress along with the older nieces. Would it be appropriate to give her another job at the reception? My mother suggested having her stand at or sit next to the gift table. Are there any other appropriate duties for a 10/11 year old girl at a reception?

The wedding itself is an LDS Temple ceremony, so there won't be any children in attendance at all, no Bridesmaids or Groomsmen in a row or anything, so that's not an issue.

PrettyPixels · Accepted Answer

Normally girls of her age (typically 9-14) are included as what is called "Junior Bridesmaid" and there are various duties you can assign her while she still wears a dress to match the other bridesmaids. 

Sometimes they participate in ways such as:

-Read a poem (perhaps one that she wrote or chose herself) or other passages.

-While junior bridesmaids are not expected to give showers, they should plan to attend and help out with cleaning up, favormaking, and more.

-At bride's request, go wedding gown shopping and give input (especially if the junior bridesmaid is a sister or daughter).

-Buy a dress similar (or the same) in color and style to the bridesmaids', plus a matching corsage (or bouquet).

-Attend the ceremony rehearsal and rehearsal dinner.

-Help out the ushers by seating guests.

-Hand out programs at the ceremony or bubbles, confetti, rice, and other send-off props afterwards.

-Walk down the aisle in the procession, and stand at the altar/stage along with the other attendants.

-Stand in the receiving line, if requested by the bride.

-Write to the bride and her parents to thank them for including her.

Answer_Lady · Answer

When I was eleven, I handed out programs and had guests sign the guestbook at my cousin's wedding. I enjoyed this because it made me feel as if I was a part of the wedding. Your niece could also help before and after the wedding, such as picking out decorations and cleaning up afterwards.

Anonymous · Answer

The 10yo could be the guestbook attendant at the reception. Or, if you're having people blow bubbles or throw rice while you and your husband leave the reception, she could help pass those things out (supervised by someone else).

♥Christmas Swagg♥ · Answer

flower girl , security , writer of vows , makes a toast , sing a song, makes sure everything goes right, tells people how to get around,cleans up,escort people ! hope this helps

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Wedding party troubles... younger girls?

4 Answers