Why do people take interracial relationships between..?(read on)?

I’m not going to say that any black woman who dates a white man has lost her mind CoCo; I don’t agree with that statement nor condone it for the simple fact that I’ve dated a white man before. And he was the most non-violent man I dated. The boyfriends that did give me hell where all black.

I think that people assume that it’s in a blacks mans nature to be abusive and harmful to any woman that he’s in a relationship with. And that white women are docile and do no harm to anyone (there fore she doesn’t deserve to be mistreated). So when a black man is seen in society as being abusive, racial comments and slurs are made, and it’s assume that he’s always been this way (regardless of what you as a white woman may have done behind close doors). This is not to say that you’re ‘asking for abuse’ by dating a black man, but this is how black men are depicted in our society. And most of our black men don’t help this stigma either when they play into the stereotypes given.

Black women are seen the same way. We’re seen as being loud, pushy, aggressive, over bearing. Bold and rude. So if a white man is seeing yelling at a black woman, it’s assumed that he’s ‘putting her in her place’ or ‘putting his foot down’ as my father use to say. People automatically assume that she was probably doing or saying something wrong that lead him to lose his cool and become aggressive or abusive. He can claim that ‘she made me do it’ excuses and in most cases people will believe him.

Edit: you’re right; there is not difference in either of the relationships you’ve referenced. Both you and I know that, but many people in our society in general don’t see it that way. As so articulated by Soulfow; people tend to (try hard) to place black women at a lower standard then a woman who’s White, even Hispanic/Latino/Mexican. I’ve heard plenty of black men say that dating/marring a black woman would be their last choice, because they feel that’s ‘scraping the bottom of the barrel’; as if we’re their last resort (and they’re just as dark as I am).

People will blindly following these beliefs and teachings in assuming that the color of someone’s skin somehow adds more value to their worth. Not realizing that there’s good in the worst of us, and bad in the best of us. Meaning if a woman or man is going to do right by you (regardless of race) they’ll do right (not cheat on you, beat you, or try and control you). But if they’re going to become verbally, mentally, physically, emotionally abusive; then that’s just who they are as individuals and there’s nothing you as a person can do to stop them.

Unfortunately, stereotypes.

Since the media portrays Black men as potentially dangerous due to overwhelming stereotypes, more people are inclined to pay attention when a Black male does something that could lead to an argument. He might not even be thinking of anything wrong.

On the other hand, if a white male is yelling at a girl, it is more likely that someone will think he's playing around due to the fact that violence and white males isn't covered nearly as much as black males. For all anyone knows, he could be very serious about it.

Those are my thoughts. My wording of them could use something to be desired, but I think you get the point.

The only way to change racial stereotypes and prejudice is to change ourselves, one by one, and teach your children right from wrong.

Sadly, there is horrid racism in the world........but that doesn't mean that each person in that particular race is bad, and having that attitude only feeds the hate....that's all it does. It's like feeding a fire. (i.e All Black men are criminals, All White men are pigs....it's simply not true, and it is ignorant to say it).

MLK said "judging a man by the content of his character not the color of his skin". This is ideal.....it's how I live my life.

And even in the face of hatred, taking the high road and not lowering yourself to the bottom of the bucket (racists) sends a very strong message.

Despite the ugliness we see, there have been many changes for the better........it takes strength to look ugliness in the face and keep your head held high. Anyone can sink, but can you swim?

All relationships have ups and downs, not just interracial ones. Ever seen a gay couple argue in a store? I think if you'd been in a mainly black neighborhood YOU would have copped most of those comments. The majority of any "race" doesn't like interracial relationships. Sad, but true.

Wow. I am amazed you even noticed.

Well, for one thing sweetie, most people don't pay ANY attention to Black women PERIOD, unless maybe they are doing or saying something negative.

Beyond that, hardly anyone believes that anyone could actually love or be interested in a Black woman.

And few people believe that Black women have feelings or can be vulnerable, the way they empathize with White, Latino or Asian women.

It doesn't matter if the Black woman is involved with Black or non Black men, people just don't care.

The stats will show you this too.

As a lawyer I have had to defend so many women in situations and the courts and general public just aren't concerned. Missing, abused, or murdered Black women are just gone. Unless their families or good detectives or someone takes up the cause, little to nothing is done about them.

Don't listen to that girl Coco, she's racist.

But that's also the answer to your question.

There is still alot of racism in this world, so,when the people saw what happened to you, (most likely people of different race from your boyfriend) they thought it was because of his race.

That's also why no one really cared about your girlfriend's situation. Because of the race she is, the racists don't care if the guy mistreats her....

The Awful Truth.

Hope this helped, I'm not really good with relationship advice!

Expectations and racism, I guess, people assume that black guys are abusive to their girlfriends (The Color Purple etc.) and people often see bad things in members of other groups while ignoring bad things in members of their own.

i date a white woman and im a black man and i never had any problems well yea maybe i might get called names but other then that i really had no proble,s

most people base their judgments on the majority of things. a black girl with a white guy is usually better off anyway you look at it.

It's our socialite pretty eff-up. It's the white man is never wrong and always has his reasons. The black man is born wrong and will be always guilty. White girl is Innocent and naive or young. Black girl is trash sup-human. There goes our socialite have a nice day. Me and my girl friend have to deal with type of thing everyday. She is 'white'.