Top ten list - just for fun. Who's in?

Top 10 benefits to being veg*n:

You can finally tell your parents with pride that you love seitan.

You will become a well qualified marine biologist after thoroughly researching the evolution of marine animals to prove that fish are in fact not plants.

You will instantly be able to get out of an unwanted conversation by bringing up your beliefs on food.

You will easily be able to ruin someone's day by suggesting they watch "Earthlings". Hey, Joaquin Phoenix is in it!

You will become so scrawny that you can glide short distances by opening an umbrella like Marry Poppins.

Everyone will assume you have an iron deficiency, so you'll never have to get stabbed at a blood drive again.

And since you're so pale no one will ask you to stand in the hot August sun either!

When someone asks "Where do you get your protein?" for the 100th time, you will finally be able to say "grass clippings" with a straight face.

You will be able to refuse your aunt's horrible cooking by telling her that it has gelatin in it... even if it really doesn't.

You're guaranteed to live long enough to dance on your enemies' graves.

10. as participants in heart studies, we are always in the control group.

9. Gives us a reason to avoid cafeteria food.

8. My nieces and nephews have stopped trying to get me to pull into a Burger King or MacDonald's

7. When you do cook for friends they are amazed at your ability in the kitchen, "Wow! and there is no cheese in this?"

6. The dogs don't beg during a quite dinner, they leave you alone.

5. At company potlucks we can shock people by telling them that it was made with tofu - after they tell you how good it was.

4. Have you seen the price of ice cream?

3. We don't have to worry about under-, or over-cooked eggs, yuck!!

2. We have learned to cook rice perfect everytime, without giving up the health benefits. (nutritionless parboiled rice brand motto)

1. The wild blackberries that grow in the neighborhood are all mine. I hear the parents tell their children "Don't eat that, you don't know if it is poisonous or not." Meanwhile I get blackberry cobbler, pie, and preserves all summer long.

5. In your case bought the farm means you did a massive animal rescue.

6. You constantly get offered the excess from people's

gardens.

7. Rabbits and birds actually invite you over for dinner.

8. You never have to buy leather cleaner or Woolite.

9. If a depression hits you can always eat beans and rice.

10. You can scare away Jehovah's witnesses by offering them Seitan.

5--It's easy to resist when someone offers candy, cookies, etc. in the kitchen at work. It's not vegan, I'm not eating it.

#4--You never have to worry about rain on leather.

Sorry, I only have two right now.

Chicks love a vegetarian.

You don't have to share your food,

You have less chance of getting a food poisoning,

You have an excuse to protest,

You can do list like these (:

Can't think of any others.

"What crazy diet are you on THIS time?"