Got a good blond joke or two?

So there's a blond, a brunette, and a redhead and they are all going to be put to death by firing squad. So the brunette is first, and the commander yells 3, 2, and the brunette yells "TORNADO!!" and everyone runs away, and she escapes. The redhead is next, 3, 2, and she yells "EARTHQUAKE!!" and they all run away again while she escapes. Finally, it's the blond's turn. The commander starts counting, 3, 2, and the blond yells "FIRE!"

Lol

Btw, I would just like to add that I'm a blond and I take no offense to blond jokes

A blond went to the auto shop because she had a dent in the car. The mechanic decided to have some fun since she was blond. He told her that she had to pop the dent out by blowing into the tailpipe. The blond goes home and does this. Her blond roomate sees her, asks her what she is doing, and after hearing the whole story, she says "No, you are doing it wrong! You have to close the windows. Duh!"

A blond and a red head go to a bar. They are watching the new. One headline says that a man is going to jump off a bridge. The redhead bets the blond $500 that he will jump, and the blond agrees. The man jumps, and as the blond is getting out the money, the red head says, "I can't take this, the truth is that I saw this on the 6 o'clock news!" The blond then says, "Me too! I just didn't think he would jump AGAIN!"

Two blonds get 2 puppies. They tie a red bow on one and a blue bow on the other so that they can tell them apart. The bows fall off. They then decide to put red and blue collars on, which also come off. Fresh out of ideas, they decide "Okay, you can keep the yellow one, and I will take the black one."

A blond, redhead, and brunette are in a swimming contest to win $100 dollars. It is 10 miles long. The redhead goes 3miles, gets tired and drowns. The brunette goes 6 miles, get tired, and drowns. The blond goes 5 miles, gets tired and swims back.

A blond (with an accent) goes to ask a man if she can paint he porch. He says yes. About 2 hours later, she says that she finished. In utter disbelief, he goes to see that his porch is the same... but his porsche (car) is not.

:p

Hope you liked them.

A blond walks into a store...

Blond: Hi sir, I would like that TV please.

Man: I'm sorry we don't serve blondes.

the blond comes back with a red-headed wig on

Blond: Hi sir i would like that TV please

Man: I'm sorry we don't serve blondes.

The blond begins to get angry, when all of a sudden a real red-head girl comes in and points to the object the blond was talking about.

Red head: I want that microwave sir.

Man: certainly

ha ha here's mine Blonde get in hell storm coming home from ball game.Car is covered in dents so next day she takes it to the repair shop.The owner seen she was blonde an decided to have a little fun told her to go home an blow into the tailpipe really hard and all the dent will pop out.So the blonde went home got down on all fores an started to blow into the tailpipe.Nothing happened so she blow harder an still nothing append.Her blonde roommate saw her an ask what r u doing.The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the tailpipe in order to get the dents out.The blonde roommate rolled her eyes and said hello!!you need to roll the windows up first.

2 blondes had pushed around the country to work out Disney international in Florida. As they approached it and have been given onto the perfect stretch of highway, they observed an illustration asserting "Disney international Left!" After thinking for a minute, the motive force blonde suggested "Oh properly!" and started driving lower back domicile. A blonde has only gotten a sparkling activities motor vehicle. She cuts out in front of a semi, and notably much reasons it to force over a cliff. the motive force furiously motions for her to tug over, and he or she does. the motive force gets out and attracts a circle and tells her to stand in it. Then he gets out his knife and cuts up her leather-based seats. He turns around and sees she's smiling. So he is going to his truck, takes out a baseball bat, and starts busting her domicile windows and beating her motor vehicle. He looks lower back to work out that she's giggling. he's definitely mad now, so he's taking his knife and slices her tires. He turns around and he or she's giggling so no longer effortless, she's approximately to cave in. He demands, "what's so humorous?" She says, "each time you weren't finding, I stepped out of the circle!' a guy comes to a decision to hold his new blonde lady chum to a soccer recreation. After the recreation is over, he asks her if she loved the recreation. She replies: "Oh it grew to become into super, I enjoyed observing those men in tight clothing, yet there is one ingredient i do no longer understand." "What did you no longer understand ?" And the blonde says: "properly, on the begginning of the recreation, the two communities flipped 1 / 4 to work out who could kick off first. Then something of the recreation every person grew to become into yelling get the quarter lower back, get the quarter lower back, get the quarter lower back. So i presumed to myself, gosh it is purely 1 / 4!"

A mother and father took their 6-year-old son to a nude beach. As the boy walked along the beach, he noticed that some of the ladies had boobs bigger than his mother's, and asked her why. She told her son, "The bigger they are the dumber the person is."

The boy pleased with the answer, goes to play in the ocean but returns to tell his mother that many of the men have larger "units" than his dad. His mother replied, "The bigger they are the dumber the person is." Again satisfied with this answer, the boy returns to the ocean to play.

Shortly after, the boy returned again. He promptly told his mother, "Daddy is talking to the dumbest girl on the beach, and the longer he talks, the dumber he gets."

This one is pretty funny! Google it.. you can find a lot haha

Q:how do you drown a blonde?

A:put a smelly sticker in the bottom of the pool

how to kill a blond? put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a swimming pool.

Umm hello!! I am blond!!! And i am not dumb!!!! See i will do 2+2=4!!! Hahahahahah

Good stuff mate you are good keep them coming your a star ha ha ha