Adoptees and Natural family members, what do you do to honor your missing family members during the holidays?

i dont really do anything, i just think about my natural parents and wonder are they thinking about me. i dont know them or anything about them so i cant call them or write or anything and my a parents never really mention them. ever. but ur question has given me the idea to start writing to them...so if i do ever meet them..thanks for that. i never thought of it.

Seeing as we don't have Thanksgiving here in Oz, I will go with Christmas.

We all have personalised decorations for the tree and I have one with my daughter's name on it... we started this tradition the year she was born (and I lost her) in her memory. For a while we did the empty place setting but it go to hard seeing it empty and so we just include her in our prayers now. I write to her too although the last couple of years I haven't, not sure why. Maybe because I feel it won't mean anything and it feels so sad to be writing down everything she has missed? I'm not sure.

Great question!

Pre-reunion ~ as I was expected to get on with my life and forget my son I always found time to have quiet time on my own.

Post reunion ~ sent son presents and cards for his birthday and Christmas plus talked on messenger if we could. When he lived with us (2 1/2 years) we shared special occasions together. Since he moved out I have had to back off as his behaviour towards us, me in particular, has gone from bad to worse - we've had a problem with his 'bad' behaviour since reunion - and my health has suffered because of it so the door is open a crack but that is it.

ETA we don't celebrate Thanksgiving in the UK

If it doesn't mean anything to her she's a fool. How awesome of you.

OOPS I forgot to answer the question.

Pre reunion, I would silently watch the interaction of my brothers and his kids. all I can say is my heart ached every time, but I never let on. It wasn't allowed.

Now I just call her and say HAPPY TURKEY DAY

UK folks, you should try it just for the fun of it. Make sure you wear something very tight so you can lay back and undo your pants after the meal, it's all part of the experience. There's a visual for ya. lol

During reunion, I would go see them the evening of the holiday, and we would go see the rest of my huge bio family.

Now that everything has went to hell, I light a candle for them. I also did this since I was about 8 years old, and it was pre-reunion. I have a gold sparkly one for my bio mom, and a blue one for my lil brother this year. Me an my bio mom love shiny stuff with glitter, and blue is my lil brothers favorite. I write my little brother a letter every christmas. With my bio moms candle, I always write a wish for something on a little piece of paper and burn it with her candle. Its a wish NOW for her to straighten up, to realize the pain she has caused, for everything to go back to how it was at first with us. Idk why I burn it, always have.

Luckily my son is no longer missing, but lives in the same house as me. However, I say a prayer for every family that was separated against their will from a child or a parent by the adoption industry.

My bio-mom and I emailed each other today to say we are thinking of one another (just as we are every day...) and to hope we both have a happy thanksgiving. I plan to email my bio-dad as soona s I am done here.

I talked to my some of my n family members via phone, others via email, as they all live on the other side of the country. I will see one of my brothers in the next few weeks, and then gifts via mail with the others at Christmas.

ETA:

((((AISLIN))) That was beautiful.

I called my first dad today and wished him a happy thanksgiving!

I called my daughter we talked for about an hour then text each other later on this evening. Thanks for asking your the only one who has.