Falling in love with a Jehovah's Witness?

Your only 17.

It's just a crush , you are to young to know what love is yet , you just think you do.

Do not become obsessed , move on with your life , sure it may hurt for a while but you will get over it & as you mature you will learn what true love is.

Remember also that love needs to come from both partners in a relationship.

Or maybe you could go study up on what his religion is really about , it may surprise you how unlike other Christians you know, the true Christians (Jehovah's Witnesses) are , look at the type of boy the Jehovah's Witnesses have following their faith compared to other Christians , you can see they are unlike other so called Christian

As Jesus said they produce good fruit.

Well, I don't know... Been reading the answers from my fellow JWs and they all seem to pretty much agree. But there is no such thing as an open and shut case. People are individuals. The reasons you give for being attracted to him are the same reasons that any JW boy his age should be found attractive to someone like you.Kind, friendly, like a total gentleman etc. Is there more to it than that?

I met my wife when she was 14 and I was 16. She was not a baptized Witness at the time and I had been baptized for 2 years. But she was in a Witness family and was an unbaptized publisher. 2 years later she was baptized and 18 months after that we were married. I still remember now how I felt looking into her blue eyes and I am 62 years old and we have been married for almost 43 years.

If you are genuinely interested in him, then do yourself and him a big favor. Look deeper into what our religion is all about. Get a couple of our publications and read them and look up the scriptures in a Bible of your own. A good place to start is our official web site. Find out how and why we are different from other "Christian" religions. There is a lot of information on our web site. When you decide if this is something that sounds like the truth then take it from there; one step at a time. If you decide it isn't for you then move on and do yourself and him a favor and forget about the whole thing saving yourself and possibly him a lot of grief.

http://www.watchtower.org/e/archives/index.htm

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RE:

Falling in love with a Jehovah's Witness?

I know a boy at my school who is extremely charming in all ways, he's bright, handsome, athletic, kind, always smiles and is a perfect gentleman with great manners. Although I am an asian female and he is caucasian, I've come to accept that since what I really love is his personality as a...

My recommendation as a Witness is to first find out more about what we believe. We give free home Bible studies and having one doesn't mean you have to become a Witness. But why ruling out becoming one until you know what we believe and how it is based on the Bible. I'm sure your friend can recommend someone who could study the Bible with you.

While you are doing that just try to focus on your school work and being 17. High school is almost over for you and real life is about to begin. Why not just sit back and enjoy it and forget about all the drama that comes with high school relationships.

And keep in mind that while us Witness guys tend to be very loveable people because of applying the fruitages of the spirit, we are still human and imperfect. Don't obsess over this or any other guy because you will end up disappointed when you find out his flaws. I'm not saying that there is no possible future for you guys, but since this brother seems sincere in his dedication to Jehovah it is going to be in the future and only if you see the value in becoming one of Jehovah's Witness.

Changing who you are for anyone isn't good, especially something as major as this. I'm not saying that compromiseing is wrong but changing your whole lifestyle is... and that is exactly what you would have to do when or if you decide to convert. Like you said your only 17, u may convert and realise later on that you don't want to get into a relationship with this boy.

I know it is hard, but make a decision and stick to it, if your not willing to change everything for him cut him off completely that is the only way your going to be able to forget about him and move on.......

While you may have "strong" feelings for this boy now, they probably won't last forever. It shouldn't matter about race or religion but, Jehovah Witnesses teach some very "interesting" concepts. If you really want to be with I do a lot of research on the religion before converting just to be with a guy at 17.

When young people talk about love it is really just infatuation. Infatuation can be a strong desire that can as you said effect your school life.

Jehovah's Witnesses are a very determined people for standards and to stick to them. If it was that you were to get him interested in you in a romantic way, you may also break his standards on how he is determined to be. Would that be a good thing or do you think that it would help him to see what he needs? It is something to think about; what does this potential partner want out of life and where does he want to head to? Is this where you want to head to? With these questions in mind it will help you to make a more informed choice about what you should do. I don't think you would deliberately want to make either of your lives unhappy but that is exactly what it could do.

Being friends between opposite sexes does not have to be a romance and this is one of the misconceptions of many people.

In the end; your choice.

Honey, I tell you this for your own good; Find Someone Else.

He sounds as if he is strong in his faith as a witness, that's why he doesn't date. Some witness kids do it on the sly, without their parents knowing. It sounds as if he has made this choice on his own.

His beliefs will not agree with yours, or with your lack of belief. He will not celebrate birthdays, Valentines Day, Christmas, Easter, or any other holiday that has pagan roots, and you will not like that. He will not be motivated by materialisim to get a high paying job, and give you a lavish life, and you likely will not like that. His world is different than yours, because being a witness is not just going to church once a week, it's a full time job. He goes out and preaches to people at their doors, telling them about the bible. He goes to meetings twice a week, and has a family bible study on another night.

You like him because he is a nice, moral boy, who treats you with respect. He is like this because he has been raised a witness, but it's highly unlikely that he will give up his faith for you, or for anyone else.

It's not that you are not a nice girl, I'm sure you are; but the differences are too great, and one of you will end up making unfair sacrifices for the other, and eventually, someone is going to feel really bitter.

He will be dating, in the future, with an eye toward getting married, not just for fun, and probably not for several years. You won't want to wait around for that. You are young, and in a year, someone else will catch your eye, and you will forget about him, what you feel is not love, but infatuation. You don't know much about him-how could you honestly love him? Love is based on what you have in common, and on shared experiences, and all you know about him is what little you see at school.

Find another boy who shares your ideas, desires and goals, because this boy does not.

Having been and still being in a similar position I would categorically say NO! Move on!!

That's not to say I have or will but perhaps the difference in you both is too big a difference to live with in harmony.

Something would have to give.

Sometimes this works out for the best, sometimes not but only true love would survive this test.

Unfortunately JWs have true love only for themselves, the New WORDS translation and the WTBTS.

Its not easy and with all due respect I believe this is a crush but if it is/was genuine love it's a bit of an effort initially and Im not sure 2 people of your age could cope with it, especially as he will be very much under the rule of his parents and "brothers and sisters".

At your age I would say no but I am a few years older than you and I met a very soon to be baptised wannabe JW 2 yrs ago. It was true love. We are currently a very close happy (most of the time) devoted to EACH OTHER couple. However we are not compatible in many ways...we are what is deemed as "unequally yolked"....but for now at least we want each other more than anything else including the being part of this particular organisation.

Because he realistically cannot be a JW and be with you if you're not.thats just the way it is.

Leslie (who I believe to be a JW?) is spot on.

Its a polite way of saying you're not good enough. Read between the lines...Thats bs. But he unfortunately will have the same level of arrogance.

But i agree with her - find someone else or better still concentrate on your studies and forget this boy. There will be plenty more boys that catch your eye, ones that you will be compatible with and share interests with.

Im not disrespecting the JWs here, an "unequally yoked" relationship especially when one half is a JW can be extremely difficult at times...for both parties Im sure. Maybe it's just not worth the hassle.

Good Luck

Edit: Notice the thumbs down, thats because I gave a PERSONAL view, they dont like it!!

Edit: To Scuba Steve JW: How lovely a story about you and your wife, fair play to you. Its nice to hear of a long and successful marriage regardless of any religion. may you have many more happy years together.

And to Leslie: Im sure your non JW ex husband probably feels the same, but courses for horses eh? No point being bitter, life goes on. And no disrespect again but I dont KNOW you are a JW...Youre just an avatar on here...you could be a satanist for all I know. Just as I could be an elder from your KH..(unlikely but possible!)

I have seen dozens of girls in congregations who have brought "worldly" boyfriends to the meetings in order to convert them in order to get married or date. I'm a Jehovah's Witness too...and honestly the religion is refreshing despite all the bad rep it gets from People who'd rather dwell in a negative lifestyle full of loose conduct and self-worshiping ideals.

I think you should tell him about your feelings and see how he reacts to this. Do not try to reel him away from his religion; this will only hurt your chances and his life. If your a mature person and serious about this relationship you should do all you can to be with him, and him the same to you...even if it means you converting. As a JW, I wouldn't convert to an Agnostic, and so I believe he wouldn't do the same. Jehovah Witnesses have a strong, global, loving, diverse community of people. You could live in California and visit a congregation in Hawaii or Japan.

And who knows...you might even convert and end up being a happily married JW couple...