Gay Etiquette - Need some advice?

You really have two options. You can wait until they refer to their significant other by title (wife, husband, partner, whatever) and just follow their example, or you can ask them what they prefer. If you ask just do so in a way that lets them know you want to know what they consider the appropriate term so that you don't offend them. Shouldn't be a problem. People who ask such questions in an honest manner are very rarely thought less of (and they act stupid about it... that says more about them than you).

As far as the rings, they symbolize a commitment just like in a marriage. The fact that the commitment isn't recognized by the government doesn't mean its less valid, only that it isn't legally recognized. They can still declare themselves together with the intention of a lifelong relationship.

First, I commend you for your question. The fact that you care about the feelings of a group that has been marginalized bigtime says a lot about you and even more about your parents. You are a good egg.

Second, I, too, live in Atlanta. I am a lesbian, and traveled to Canada to marry my partner of 15 years two years ago. Speaking from personal experience, I don't think that anyone, any place would legitimately be offended if you referred to his or her other half as a "partner." Some people use "life partner," but that can be overkill for a couple that's been dating for 2 months. BF and GF sound immature and stupid when you are talking about grown ups in their 40's and 50's. Sometimes "your better half" is fun, but some conversations are more serious than that. So, my vote is "partner." It's safe, it does not out anyone who may be sensitive (remember, just because your colleagues may be open around you, they may be closeted around an important client or a big boss). And, if the person you are talking to does not like the term as much as another that he or she has in mind, that gives them an opportunity to correct you, hopefully in as polite and solicitious a way as your question was posed. Good luck with the new job.

I just wouldn't concern myself with the wedding bands and say boyfriend/giirlfriend. If they're married, or have a civil partnership, or don't like the term for whatever reason then they can correct you. But they shouldn't be insulted by that.

Why don't you ask them? Or use the terms they use. I generally use partner when I'm not sure.

They could be married in a religious ceremony. Your union doesn't have to be recognized by law to wear a wedding ring.

Maybe they didn't get married in GA, or even officially, but for each other.

If you want to make sure, ask them what to call their partners. I'm sure they won't mind, and I'd say they may even be touched by your interest. Partner is usually good, however.

Hmmm...Interesting question! When I'm in that situation, even with people who are not married, I refer to them as "significant others, "spousal replicas," or something like that to make it funny--or try. Then, since they feel comfortable enough around you to talk about them, I'm sure they wouldn't mind you asking. In fact, they may appreciate it.

Partner would be the best word to use.

Partner or mate, or just ask them. I doubt they would find your not wanting to offend them offensive.

Work is not a place for personal conversations and relationships. Work is where you do your job and keep your mouth shut!

'Partner' should be acceptable in all cases, I would think.