How does a celibate woman keep a man interested while staying true to herself?

I guess you have to keep on looking for a man who is interested in you as a person rather than looking for a regular bed partner. There are men out there who will actually respect your choice to wait, and even some who are also waiting. Unfortunately for women like you, and others I know who are waiting, men these days seem to expect sex because most women are more than willing to give it up with minimal effort from a man. It's a real shame. There is so much more to life, so much more to us as people, than sex, and yet people act like it's the be all, end all of every romantic relationship. It's so backwards.

Dating While Celibate

Okay, I am going to redefine your question a bit.

Reactions (1) and (3) are inevitable and it's best to just accept that reality.

So really, you want to know how to keep guys who react like (2) from growing tired of it.

This is going to be very difficult but I won't say impossible.

You need to ask yourself what your standard is. Is he willing to marry before you have sex? And what is your standard for marriage?

(Counseling may help you sort through some of these issues.)

Where are you meeting men? Are you religious? Meeting men through religious activities may help your chances.

What else do you offer? Are you a good cook? A good dancer? A good conversationalist? Do you make a fun date, perhaps engaging in outdoor or sporting activities?

There are ways you can keep it fun for the guy without sex but you're right: most men won't wait.

I do wish you luck in finding someone who will.

Most guys do think a woman in her 30's is sexually active. Do not compromise yourself because of the reactions you get from the guys you date. When a guy is really interested in you, he will wait. There is a man out there who will respect you and will be patient with you.

I was wondering something. Do you have other expectations besides not having sex prior to marriage? Although your decision to remain celibate may have stayed the same but what are your expectations in a partner? If your expectations are too great, they may feel they can not live up to this impossible ideal you have.

I will agree with you in some men might get turned off because of it. I also agree some men consider it a challenge. They want to be the one who "got" you. None of these guys are worth your time or energy.

As for that friend of yours, you know what his expectations are, just remain friends with him.

Answering this question means stereotyping. Some of the point may be true for some for some time. Not necessarily all points will be true for all women all time. Hence, it is a good question but respect Woman as she is is the answer.

You can't blame them for wanting sex. A healthy outlook on sex isn't a negative thing, and you'll find this out in the future.. Most guys are of the mindset that if you love and trust him why can't you have sex with him? That seems very logical to us. If you're waiting for that 'special' guy how long will it take before I'm that guy? That's what would be running through my mind and that's what would begin to bother me after a while.. Not out of insecurity, more because of utter frustration.

BUT, there are some solutions.

1 - Find a new guy who shares your beliefs

2 - Allow him to have sex with someone else

3 - Get married

4 - See if he waits {but don't expect a guy to wait forever}!

30 something is a little older than the virgins I know, maybe you need to seriously think about opening up a new chapter in your life..

The only thing you can do is find a man who respects your decision and wants to eventually marry too. Few men in their 30s are virgins or want to be celibate.

Date through a church group, or try this:

http://purepear.com/

One thing you can try is giving oral. That way he gets satisfied but you don't have to break the seal downstairs. I mean if she was "the one" I could see myself being OK with that. But also, I'd really want to get married sooner rather than later.

You can't.

Men expect sex - sex is the only thing that a woman can offer a man that's of any value, so why in the heck would a guy wait potentially years until you're both ready to get married for it?

It is pointless.