New Poem, what do you think?

I like these kind of poems as I think they have the potential to be really passionate, something that your poem unfortunately isn't, I can see that there is a strong message in there but it needs to be fortified by passion and also it needs to be convincing, it sounds kind of half hearted. I like your poem, it's just a bit ordinary. You need to tell how you feel, and maybe use more metaphors. I love the line "feed that fire", I think you've used it very well.

I like it. it's really hard for me to simply read it as a poem and not imagine music beats, because they sound they would make good song lyrics. =P But yeah, it's great, the best I've read in a while.

Anti-conformity is always good to hear. This is really well written, good job.