fighting with my 17 year old daughter about money?

"Never mix money and family" - there's a reason that phrase exists.

The truth of the matter is that both of you were a little wrong here: you both should have agreed on terms before money ever changed hands.

But you can't change the past, so moving forward: You need to pay your daughter back. She worked really hard for that money and you can't use your position as her mother to blackmail her into giving you free money. She lives with you because she legally has to, not because it's her choice. Any attempt to get money out of her is exploitation pure and simple.

Let me see if I understand what you are typing. You have a 17 year old daughter that is just about to turn 18 years old. Over the summer vacation she got a job and is paying all her bills and pays for college. You stated that you 'took' $500 from her and even your mother borrowed $400 for gambling bills. For some reason she is expecting you to pay her back. You have fed her; cloth her and she should be glad to have the place you provide her to live at. You admit that it would take you half the time it would for her to make the money.

You are telling me that you soon to be 18 year old daughter worked for over 67 hours to get the money the you took from her and some how think that she should just give you the money. You have to realize the YOU are the one that needed her money. It really does not make any difference what it was for or even if the money was going to be used for bills that might effect her room and board. Then you are saying YOUR mother borrowed another $400 and now all she has in her account is $10.

I totally agree that you child needs to contribute and help out with the things that you have and am providing her. I can appreciate that you may want to teach her responsibility and even that going to work is not always a party.

My question to you is what kind of lesson are you going to teach her by just taking her money. If you believe this or not, she earned the money she made. She is doing something constructive with what she made, and was even willing to give you money when you needed. You should be proud of her. You seem to have raised a daughter that is doing constructive things with the money and shows a lot of responsibility with the money she has earned. She gave you and your mother so much of what she had that she is just left with $10. You claim she should contribute, yet this is the wrong way of teaching her this.

You can not sit there and try to teach her responsibility to pay the bills she creates, then take her money to pay the bills you owe and refuse to pay her back.

You have to decide what lesson you are trying to teach.

When the money was given to you, was it with the understanding that she was giving you the money? Did you tell her that the money was to 'contribute' something to the house?

Help your daughter out. She has shown responsibility and has even paid for her college. That is not easy to do. It is also ridiculous she has to help her grandma with her "gambling" debts. It seems she is the only adult in the household.

As her mother, you should WANT TO help her and help her save money. Like you said $500 is not a large sum to you, so why not give it back to her? You have already worked most of your life and receive child support. If you were unable to handle your money then that's your fault.You are lucky you are not paying for her college tuition. College AND books cost a lot.

Stop complaining over money. If you wish not to give her money back then help her pay for her school. Afterall, you ARE her MOTHER. So do your job! You have a great child and just don't know it.

Damn I'd hate to be your kid, you suck. If it's not a 'big deal' and you make that much money in such little time than pay her back if it's so little. You guys took almost half of what she worked for over the summer, and yeah she's gonna be an adult soon so THAT'S HER MONEY. The reason you got her job in the first place is so that she wouldn't be taking money from you yet you're doing the same thing. AND she shouldn't have to pay for your moms GAMBLING MONEY. What the hell is wrong with you? I feel bad for her you're a horrible mom.

I would. And your intelligence makes no difference to my answer. You are 17 and it isn't a big deal. As long as you don't wear huge rings, it wouldn't hurt your job prospects. You sound like you have wanted one for a while. My daughter wanted a belly button piercing when she was 15. I told her she could on her sixteenth birthday if she still wanted one. She decided she didn't. As long as you have given yourself enough time to change your mind, I would allow it. But if your mum is not happy with that, it would be much better just to wait for another year. It won't hurt and a piercing is less important than your relationship. It isn't a life or death situation. It's just a ring.

I bet she can't wait to move out. Pay her the money you owe her. Why do you think she owes you anything. She's your daughter and by the looks of it she is the adult here. You should help her out because you love her, not because you expect to be paid by her. Sorry Mom if you ask me.

You type like a 10 year old.

that is not right

she is your daughter u r suppose to take care of her

and you should pay her back, it is wat is right

plus, her grandma should get over gambling if she has no money

it is your main job, to prepare your kids for the future and you shouldnt start by telling them that their kids are required to pay them for taking care of them

if thats so, then you should be the one to pay for your moms gambling. after, she did raise to what you are right now.

I hate yu and I don't even know yu.lol. Yur a bad mom. Yur daughter appreciates everything yu do. She ain't even grown yet. Yu a lazy *** bum lady..

thts not right she has no obligation to help u since she is the child and its ur job to care for her not the other way around if she saved up ever thought it was for something she wanted? the girl paid for her own college wat else do u want?????