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My mother-in-law drives me nuts doing good things?

Everytime my wife and I go over to my in-laws house, my mother in law offers us someting. Now considering that my wife and I are back in college (for grad school), you would think that it shouldnt be a problem, but I feel as if she offers stuff to avoid talking to me, or that maybe she has good intentions all together but that I'm just a little bit prideful and wish she would only offer occasionally rather than every single time that we are over. (Twice a month at most) I feel uncomfortable with her offering us something every time. Is there something wrong with me. Should I be greatful considering that my wife and I are full time grad students with little money. I just dont like it.

Give me a solution to accept this form of love or give me a way to tell her to back off with the gifts.

Update:

My father did the same thing for the longest before I got married. I just quit accepting things that he would offer. I felt that I wasnt independent by taking things from him. Now when my wife and I were dating/engaged, he would offer her stuff and not me stuff and that was fine with me because we didnt live together until we got married. I think if she (MIL) would just offer the things to my wife (who won't turn them down) maybe I wouldnt have to feel guilty for saying no.

2 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    Yes you should be grateful. She sounds like a helpful friendly soul. It is really up to your wife to turn down the gifts. You just say thank you.

  • Let me ask you something...... if your parents were able to do the same thing would you resent it? Think about it.

    Honey just be really thrilled that your MIL isn't spiteful. Or mean spirited. Or she isn't manipulative. Or that she belittles you. Or that she belittles you to all the family behind your back. Or that she thinks you aren't good enough for her daughter.

    I called mine the monster in law. She was all of the above. She never intentionally, willingly did anything for me. When we lived close to her, she took my husband's time away from his own family because she wanted his attention without any of us, me and her own grandchildren around.

    I understand what you are saying.... but she want's to share with you and her daughter. Just say thank you and move on. Some day you might be in her shoes and want to share with your children and their spouses.

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