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A poem to the child. Comments/Critiques?
You wring the world with Mermaids and other oceania
Place rings on many fingered kings hiding in the arcana
Your cerulean agates flash -- it's simply manna
And empathy with all is your simple mantra.
What can I say to you, but be well
though storms inside and outside rage
life isn't easy but it can be swell
if we ride the emotions and turn the page.
Ride the wild west making safe the worried folk
Have galaxies for an egg and God for a yolk
Calculate the quanta and burst into smoke
Life's not a riddle if you're in on the joke.
If your inner child has wandered again
here it comes now arm and arm with a friend.
Comments/Critiques?
It's for a person NAMED child.
11 Answers
- DaisyLv 71 decade agoFavorite Answer
I have a real problem with S2 L3
it cheapens the whole effort with it's tasseled dingle-bobs and garish colors...swell?
otherwise, this reads as a poetically contemplated and delivered word of insight and wisdom to one whom you know well.
it's not bad
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Agenda item #1- Careful, The Martians will accuse you of child molestation.
Agenda item #2- The poem was okay.
- ?Lv 71 decade ago
One of your best, HH.. There is much Love in this, and I echo the sentiment as well. Said Child has thrown me a lifeline more than a few times and I am a great fan. She is original and so prolific in her work. Truly a serious artist. Great Heartfelt Homage.
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- Yesu BenLv 71 decade ago
The Child will love this surely H! Great homage. Asker and Moongirl: stick around to know who she is.
- 1 decade ago
Big hugs for Child, and you too.
An inner childs dreams
may be the best kept.
I liked this HH.
- 1 decade ago
A child couldn't understand most words in this poem. It is good, just not making much sense too me.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Since its a poem to a child, i suggest you write it in a simpler form. It is a good poem though.
- OakwolfLv 61 decade ago
I can't keep up with the conversation tonight, but I know "heartfelt" when I see it. Kind and good.
