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What is wrong with my husband, mentally?

Here is what my husband has been like in the past 2 years---

fired from 2 jobs for lying and petty theft (saying he was home sick, but going to hockey, "borrowing" petty change from office, etc)

Going into rages- yelling and screaming and punching holes in walls, then an hour later being calm and happy, and acting like nothing happened

One day says he loves a book, the next day raging about how he hates it

Saying he hates people, randomly and without reason

Saying our one child is "such a perfect kid" and saying the other one "is a pain in the *** and has something wrong with him"

Spends days without barely talking to anyone

Lying about money- saying he got paid for small jobs he does, but not having the $ and no proof he got paid

Saying he called someone and talked to them- when I check with that person, they say they havent talked to him

Saying he did the laundry, then finding it still in the laundry room closet

Barely sleeping- maybe like 4 hours a day, tops.

Lying on the couch all day and watching tv, then going into a total rage if asked to do something

Says he took the dog for a walk to get out of the house, but when I ask him where the leash is, he will say "oh, i dont know i put it down by the door"-- (it was with me in my car all day)

Refusing to talk to family, and totally alienating my family, too- will send them emails saying "we" no longer want them in our lives

Says he went to the bank and deposited a cheque of mine, but the bank has no proof of it. Then when I ask him about it, he says they must have lost it, not his fault.

Avoiding phone calls except from his hockey buddies, to talk about hockey- that's literally ALL he is interested in lately

Will tell people he works as a consultant and makes $200 grand a year- when really he is home on the couch all day, unemployed.

He says if I leave him he will fight me for the kids, and make my life hell

Has gotten THOUSANDS of dollars in traffic tickets lately- mainly due to him not registering our van, not paying tickets, having suspended license, telling me he paid the car insurance but not doing so, etc. he also stole a license plate from our neighbors car, because we didnt haver any on our new van, which is now impounded due to this issue.

Will NOT accept responsibility for anything- says everyone hates him, I hate him, I want him to leave, etc. It is NEVER his fault, according to him.

Admits he lies to me constantly, he "doesnt know why"

I am at my wits end. I have found a new place to live for the kids and I, and will be leaving within a month. HE just seems so unstable, it's really freaking me out. I wish I could deal, because I love him, but the past 3 years have been hell. He REFUSES to get help, says our relationship is "awesome, why would we need help??".

Do you have any idea what could be wrong??? If I find something online to show him, to try to convince him to seek help, it would be great. I also have an appointment for the kids and I to see a counsellor next week.

thanks.

Update:

He also just called me from his cell, at hockey, to tell me he has a court date tomorrow about the traffic tickets, he will be at it all day, he needs my visa to pay the fines. -- he also says he told me about this court date WEEKS ago, which he never did- he told me he had paid the fines, so no court date. Now, there is a court date, and he still needs to pay the fines. Another lie.

3 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I would say that you need to leave him and take the kids with you. What he's doing to you is not right, and can be considered abuse in court. Take the kids and run! Leave while you can! I hope that this helps and that you'll be ok. God bless!

  • tj
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    i really cant answer whats wrong with him-mentally, but yes this a form of abuse to you. You cant force him to get help, he will have to hit rock bottom before he wants to change himself. Its good you have found a place for you and the kids its just a shame you have to wait a whole month.

    Do not give him the visa to "pay fines". if you are willing to actually pay them go to the court house and see for yourself, or maybe you could even call to confirm if they exist and how much. If he says he paid them before he could have been lying and they do need paid, or tell him you will meet him there.

    either way its probly bound to set him off, but geez how do you know he wont just get a cash advance and gamble it all away.

    does he receive EI?

    stand your ground and dont believe he could get custody just because he says- even if he fought you he would probly just make himself look unstable and be caught in lies in court since he has a serious problem tellling the truth.

    Oops i just realized he called you 2 days ago about the court,

    I suggest if he threatens you or has another raging fit, or you feel unsafe in anyway- act calmly at at your first chance get outta there even if you have to go to a womens shelter. as far as i know you dont have to be beaten to go there? its a safe place.

    Good luck

    (did you get my email a while back about bankruptcy )

  • 1 decade ago

    Bipolar Disorder and being plain out lazy

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