How do I respond? They said I'm not his daughter. That I'm his adopted step-daughter.?

I would have your dad explain to this woman that you saw this on FB and tell her that the comment was hurtful to both of you.

eta:You can respond back to her second comment with "so everyone should know that would make me his legal daughter".

I'm sorry about your dad.

As I understand, you are a Mormon woman. I assume that your parents have been sealed in the temple, and if so, that you are also sealed to them, or you have been born in the covenant.

On your membership record, you could look up, which of the two you are. Go ask your bishop.

If you are sealed to them some time after your birth, it is well possible that you are adopted. Next time you go to the temple, take part in a sealing to parents and listen to the promise that were made to you.

One of those is that you receive every eternal and temporal right that children born in the covenant receive. There is zero difference between someone born in the covenant and someone sealed to parents afterwards. Before the LORD, before the Church, before the world, you are Tom's daughter. He's the only father you ever knew, and he is the father you will be with in eternity.

Since that is as it is, would it have been good for you to know beforehand that there was something in your mother's life that probably complicates the issue? Or would this have raised more problems for you as a teen? And if after all those years and the death of your father, your mother simply forgot to tell you, so what? It does not have any bearing on your mortal life OR your eternity.

And I do think this is what you should also tell your aunt: In Mormon circles, it is very impolite to take away somebody's rights as a sealed child, by pointing out that this somebody is not the "real" child of the parents.

Also, theologically, it is a very bad idea. The Apostle Paul said that we are adopted children of God. That is, we are children of God in any way that counts, and heirs to the promise. How would auntie feel, if someone told her, that she is not *really* a child of God, but only the adopted afterthought?

She hurt you, and it is only fair to tell her, that she did, and why it hurt, and how much it hurt.

If she apologizes, good for her. If not, forgive and forget. It's her problem, not yours.

First, I would delete the aunt's comment. Then I would drop her off my friend list so she couldn't comment on my page anymore. It's not like she really thinks she's your aunt, after all.

If I didn't delete her from my friend list, I'd still delete her comment. If this wasn't on your page and you can't delete it I'd put up one of my own, something along the lines of " 'Aunt', my father never made that distinction, and out of respect for his memory I don't either."

How have Tracey and Keri responded?

I would contact aunt privately and tell her that you were hurt by her comment. Tom is your father for all earthly purposes. If she feels like it is necessary to make this "correction", then you might also remind her that she is not your "aunt" either. That being the case, she can keep her opinions to herself. I wouldn't get that blunt until she evidences an unwillingness to apologize.

Best wishes

When my brother died while in the army, it came out that my dad wasn't my real dad either. My mum thought I should know and I was very upset, i'd just lost my big brother and then I found out my dad wasn't my actual dad. A year later I decided I wanted to know who my real dad was, when I got in touch with him he didn't want anything to do with me as he'd moved on, this is like 2 years ago, and now i've learned to accept it. I can understand why nobody told me, although i'm still very angry about it, I would go and ask your mum about it or your aunt. When ever I get upset about it, I just look to my dad and think he must love me to of looked after me for 17 years and loved me, family isn't always about blood hes proved that, just think about if you want to find your real dad, or if you'd rather leave things be, either way I was hurt. Good luck and I hope you can sort this out with your family X

Just saying...

What an uncool, unkind foolish thing to say to people. And stupid. and Lame, and Useless.

Your father loved you dearly and he's looking down from heaven on his sister, (Or is it sister in law...since we are being precise) and throwing spitballs at her.

Tell her what you said here. Say, " I was shocked and hurt, when you said I wasn't Tom's daughter. " Ask her for an apology. Then be done with it after having said what you felt, regardless of how she responds. After that, just let it drop.

He's the only father you have ever known...and legally-adopted means legally that you are his daughter so she can eat her words. He chose to adopt you which means he chose to make you his, so regardless of her "opinion" she should be quiet.You are your father's daughter in every way that matters. Blood isn't everything.

You definitely have a right to be hurt. If I were you I would write back "Susan, Tom is not my 'legal parent'. Blood or not, he always has been and always will be my father. It hurts that you would question that."

Do you love your step-father? Does he love you? If the answer to those two questions is "yes" then you *are* his daughter and he is your father.

Anyone who wants to overlook that and concentrate on legalities doesn't know what it is like to love a child unconditionally.

Dena

A ''good' aunt'' would never insult you like that.who gives a tit id=f she is religious..she needs to be put in her place.you dont have to be hasty about it.