In Biblical times, had the marvelous spork been invented yet?

No, the spork wasn't invented until the year 1474 by an easily distracted silversmith named Johann "The Dunderkopf" Augustus Vernerschnitzlen. He was unfortunately enough to have a workshop opposite the local Bierstube/Kattenhausen. So between der bier and der hussyfrauleins, he was constantly dropping whatever he was working on.

(His other knickname was Johann "der Scalded Valnuts," but I digress.)

One day a particularly loverly streetenvalken fraulein passed by Johann's vin. . .I mean, window, just as he was finishing up a set of silverware for the Mayor's wife. Things might have been fine except that she noticed Johann's rapt gaze and decided to have a little fun with him. She dropped her kerchiefderhanden so that she would have to bend over and pick it up -- thus affording him a perfect view of her luffylaidyhumpenz.

Needless to say, neither the silver fork or what was left of Johann's Herrhood were ever quite the same. However, the badly distorted utensil gave him an idea, and soon he was seen on Discovery Channel, hawking the "Miracle Sporkenforken." He made a fortune, sold the silversmithing business, and retired to Cancun.

I'd love to say that there is a moral to this story, but the only ones I've thought of would get my account suspended instantly. But there you have it: the true origin of the marvelous spork.

And if you call in the next ten minutes. . .

How about a sporkife? a spoon, fork and knife combo. All in one tool: cut and eat away. LOL

Did not need to be fancy back then, cut and eat. Hands and fingers OK as well.

bless you.

All you have to do is add a cutting edge to one side of the spork to get a sporkife. Serrated plastic edge should suffice. Yet not cut the mouth when in use as a spoon or fork.

take care.

I'm sure it's in the Pastafarian Bible. Something about "Taketh thee thy Spork and insert thy Spork into thy delicious bowl of fettucine, for verily I hath tasted it with my Divine Spork and found it good".

Parmesan 14:3, I think.

We know that John The Baptist are locust and wild honey.

Just the type of vitals that one would want to spork up!

Not sure, but I doubt it.

Sporks are what you eat with when you're not sure.

Well, darling, I'm sure if I looked hard enough, I could find a reference to it - it is supposed to be filled with prophecies, after all!

(((Zilla)))

I love kentucky fried potatoes and gravy

Yes, Satan has always been fond

of saying "spork me, baby" to

his new arrivals.

You know... as a welcoming gesture.

(((Zilla))) =D

It had been but they just didn't know it. And they didn't know that there was anything wrong with a spoon that had a ragged edge.

I assume they ate with their fingers back then.