Controverial topic: Co-ed full contact training? Would you fight a female with full intent?

I rarely spar full-contact, unless you can EVER call BJJ rolling "sparring full-contact". For RBSD, the drills tend to be more circumscribed, with clear parameters for safety and to make the training more beneficial by being more focused.

Even when it's implicit that we're "going full-on", in BJJ we routinely "dial it down" according to where our partner's at, depending on size and strength differential, impairment or injury, ability level, etc. Gender doesn't factor into it, and I've rolled against women larger and stronger than me. (OK, that's one or two.)

Key issues are informed consent, safety, respect, and compassion. Gender doesn't play into it directly. If SHE'S uncomfortable hugging a guy between her legs and rolling around, then respect and compassion are the issue--gender isn't the issue for ME, I'm just respecting her comfort level and trying to help her up her game gradually, at the pace she's ready for.

FRAT: gender is not at issue. Guy or girl, it's a matter of informed consent, safety, respect, and compassion.

I honestly cannot go full out when sparring with a female, if I'm a better sparrer than they are. I think it is just me, being raised by a single mom and having he respect and dignity thing drilled into me from a young age.

That's not to say that I don't spar hard, I do. I don't allow a female opponent free shots and I do take openings when they are there, I just don't use full force. Some of it may have to do with my size also. I'm 6 ft, 205 lbs and I lift weights 4 days/week. I have dropped female opponents before and I always feel guilty about it. I just don't want to be thought of as some bully in class trying to beat up opponents and hurt their confidence.

That being said, when I was a colored belt and sparring against female black belts, I did spar full contact because they were better than me, that's how you learn to get better. But as my skills have progressed, I have revised my sparring procedure with females and respectful teenagers. I do spar with cocky, arrogant male teenagers and I hold nothing back in that case.

I have seen this news story and its a very interesting topic. I have sparred with only a few females but only one that i would consider more skilled than me. That particular woman, as well as the others, didn't have the strength or speed to come close to being a challenge. I did and do go easy on all of them as a result. If i come across a situation where i am sparring a female who is physically able to safely engage in "full contact / aliveness" with me (i have no doubt that they do exist) than i would use reasonable force.

They should know full well where they are and what they have chosen. It would defeat the purpose not to.

However, for me on the other hand, I have a habit of holding back anyway. I never fight full force. What I do is try and match the person. I don't do it intentionally, but it's uncomfortable when I try and change it. I always fight at equal strength... when I can.

Whenever I spar, I do so with a sense of "play", so to speak. Not only do I spar, I also gage my own strength and ability. In matching the other person, to what I think is a match, gives me a better assumption of myself. That also helps in keeping my mind still and useless thoughts out.

But for the question: Would I go go full force and full intent if that is what she wishes? -- Yes. On all other things you mentioned, I agreed.

I've never really thought about it that much. I'm perfectly comfortable with going full force grappling with women and I have submitted many before, but they have also submitted me. Granted she was a higher rank but she was a serious threat and going easy wasn't much of an option.

I'm not entirely sure how what I would do when faced with full force striking against a female as I have never had the opportunity. I probably would end up going easy on them even if they were better than me. I'm not saying its wrong if they are consenting but I doubt I'd be able to go full boar on them.

However involving a life or death situation I wouldn't hesitate to go all out on a female that was a threat to my life.

I read the article and watched the video attached with it from yahoo news.

I can understand the social pressures that that boy has to deal with in that situation, but I personally disagree with his forfeiting. That however is my opinion and I do not condemn him for his choice.

As far as my view on the topic and response to your question; I don't have a problem with it. I have, and will continue to train full contact, and full intent with my training partners/opponents (when the time calls for it) if that is their wish, both male and female. I do feel that it is absolutely necessary for each and every person who is training in any sort of self defense to know the possibilities of a confrontation. I also think that some males need to understand that a woman can be a formidable opponent.

No I would not and I have sparred with numerous females at different levels and there in lies the answer I think. I have sparred with pro-female fighters and with them I will use more power but still exercise some control because most men have trouble taking a punch or good kick from me. Hitting a lighter framed, lighter weight female or even male to hard just bangs them up and increases the chance of injuring them and then they can't train and fight. A skilled, well trained coach or instructor will monitor this and if sparring himself will use control and hit and kick them hard enough but not so hard that it causes training injuries.

They will also match them with certain sparring partners who also have an understanding of this and the ability to control how hard they are landing things. That is one of the marks of a good sparring partner and a good sparring session really is one that will challenge and push you without seriously injuring you and only overwhelm you for the right reasons at the right times and not for the wrong reasons at the wrong times.

If I have to hit a lighter sparring partner really hard to get them to understand or see something or realize something then that is only after I have tried or done everything else before that in trying to get them to see or understand it. Even then I exercise some control usually as hurting a fighter that is getting ready for a fight to much breaks them down physically. It causes problems in other ways like training injuries and then they go into a fight already hurt.

I have never had to KO a lighter framed fighter to just toughen them up or get them to understand an aspect in their training. In regards to submitting them here again control should be used and taking things to far will only hurt them excessively. There are better methods for training that are more effective and will accomplish this without the risk of injuring them. There is a difference in working with different levels of fighters and one thing I use is a stick that I keep handy. If a fighter does not respond to something I will whack them with that stick on the thigh or bicep. That little sting I have found to be more effective in changing or altering their approach to something than taking things to far. It is one of the differences in the way you work with someone that is at a different level than how you would work with and train a beginner and avoids training injuries and breaking fighters down physically.

I just heard about that story as well.

I think the issue with wrestling is more that it starts to look like public sex when a man is trying to win against a woman.

This can have certain ramifications on whether the male can generate the right intent to win.

Also the ethical obligations of a trainer is far different from that of a college aged competitor. He is not there to "train" anybody, male or female. He competes because he wants to. Because that is his path to self-improvement. HIs question is "is trying to win against women in wrestling, a self-improvement".

Yes, but it depends on the level of the person I'm sparring against. I'd say that... about a year ago, I was sparring full force with a female black belt because my instructor told me not to go easy on her, and he wasn't kidding. Since I was a yellow belt, I had full sparring gear. Black belts at my dojo/-ang usually aren't allowed to wear protective gear when sparring with lower belts since they're expected to have more skill and utilize their defense training. But yeah, I was sparring with her and the closest thing to contact I made were swipes on the gi, but not much else. She was significantly faster than me when it came to striking and dodging, had more aerobic and muscular endurance, so I wasn't worried about how much force I was using. Despite no gear, she was winning. But if I'm sparring a female in my class who is the same level as me (green or blue belt), I do hold back on how powerful I allow my kicks to get, but I still do everything I can to hit them.

Keep in mind that my class is mostly composed of 8-16 y/o's with two adults. I'm the 16 year old male, 185lbs and I'm not sparring to knock out any kids. lol But I do make them work for a hit on me or keep them on defense.

I would and have during training when they asked for it. There are only a few female students in my martial arts classes before and currently and most of those who stay are the hard core ones who are there to learn, not flirt with guys. So I make it a point to help them learn by testing them to their limits whenever I'm paired with them and not hold back like most guys tend to do. It's also probably why my instructors prefer to partner me with a new female student who joins the class, because they know I won't be spending the whole time trying to ask them for their numbers. The last time I fought a female student was during the final part of our Karate belting promotion where we were required to engage in full contact Kumite albeit limited to the body only. I was paired with the only female student testing for promotion and traded strike for strike with her making the other male students cringe every time I connected, she gave as good as she got and caught me with some good shots a couple of times as well. Our instructor later squared off against her in the difficult round and didn't hold back either. We were also paired off during the grappling part of our test and like before, I didn't hold back and made her work for her belt. We both ended up with welts and bruises all over our bodies after the exam, but she didn't complain and passed with flying colors. Today all the other students treat her with respect, because they know she earned her belt the hard way. In my opinion, going easy on them would be a crime, because they come to train for the possibility that they might have to defend themselves from an attack in the future, going easy on them would give them the illusion that they are good enough even though they aren't and that could lead to false confidence that could get them in trouble or worse, dead if they ever encounter danger out there. For me, the moment they step into the dojo and wear a Gi, they cease to be male or female, they are just Aikidoka or Karateka there to train.