Is this "friend" taking advantage of/using me?

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yes she is using you. The real question is "is she aware that she's using you?" I definitely give thumbs up to the first answer here, Tell her gas prices are getting too high and financially right now its hard for you to keep making the trip. Hopefully she will quickly realize that she's putting her friend in a bad situation. And hopefully the too frequent favors end there. If you tell her this and she stars bring up the whole "boo hoo you have a partner and I'm a single mom help me out" then you have a problem, because then you will know that she is aware that she is taking advantage of your kindness and probably isn't your friend. Hopefully your kids will still be able to do play dates from time to time.

She is not being a good friend and she is leaning on you way more than she allows you to lean back on her. I would tell her that i love hanging out but i am going to have to stop watching her daughter tell her how much you love her little girl but times are tough and you are going to look for a job to help with the finances at YOUR house. Tell her it makes you feel bad to see all the pretty things that she has and you want to make sure your little one doesn't go without. Or you could leave that last part out people will do what you let them do to you so you need to take just a little responsibility and mom up and get the heck out of there. There are lots of other kids for your little one to play with that don't come with self centered emotional bloodsuckers for parents. Just saying. good luck

yes, it seems like she's using you and I think you need to learn how to say NO. I'm a single mother and do ask my mom or sister to watch my daughter OCCASIONALLY. No more than twice a month if that! You need to have a conversation with her about this and let her know what it is you want/dont want. It seems like you have some built up hostilities so stay calm but get everything out! Let her know!

No, she asks you and you continue to say yes, so she has no reason to offer to pay when you have shown no will to be paid. She isn't psychic, for all she knows you are completely content with the current situation, since you've never said no or asked for any money, she probably thinks the museums and zoos are payment enough since you've never said anything. If she gets food stamps, then she has a limited amount of food a week, so she might just be careful about keeping enough for her and her daughters. You cant expect to be invited to every little thing, she already goes out to the museum and the zoo with you, sometimes its just something between her and her one other friend, so they can make plans and hang out together, it doesnt mean that shes snuffing you, just that she doesnt have to invite you to everything just because you watch her daughter, shes allowed to have one on one time with her other friends. If you want money, say "hey, Ive been watching ____ for a while now, I dont mind and I really enjoy it, but Ive been spending a lot of time with her and I would like some payment in return."

edit: So because I gave an answer that was the honest truth and you didn't like it and I didn't just agree with you, I have bad manners. Nice. Its actually a little funny considering everyone I know says I overdo it when it comes to manners. Don't mistake asked for honesty and bad manners. She is being considerate when she asks you to go to the places she does ask you to go to. If she walked up to a group of people and invited every single one of them out to dinner except for you, that would be rude, but having a private conversation with her friend and making plans to get together while picking up her child, not rude, she just has other friends. The bottom line is you asked about money for babysitting. If you don't tell her that you would like to be paid and you keep on going on as if the current arrangements fine, then she wont know otherwise. You have to voice your concerns so she knows how you feel.

edit: Or maybe its because I dont like people making false judgements of me because I dont agree with them. Do you really think those thumbs things really mean anything on here. Its not devils advocate when I believe in what Im saying, its called having a different opinion, you shouldnt attack people for having one. Are you seriously comparing yourself, a friend who babysits for a friend who is under the assumption that you dont mind, to a battered woman? Even if they arent the same thing, that just makes no sense. Theres a huge difference between beating someone, which everyone knows is wrong, and babysitting for free, which can be assumed that its done out of friendship. Shes not taking advantage when you gave given her no reason to know that you feel cheated, she thinks you are fine with the arrangement. I dont have an attitude, I just give the honest truth, I dont sugar coat it like others who are afraid of getting thumbs downs and not getting best answer, Im actually on here to help people, not for meaningless points.

she is definitely using you... esp for how much money she is making... if you want to keep the friendship try maybe saying something like "i love watching your little one but with gas prices getting higher right now I just dont have the gas money to drive over here" or start saying you are busy on the days she needs you to watch her or that you have other plans