Are other married people doing this so they can be happy someday?

I don't know about others in general but I think waiting till the time is right is sensible.

Adults have to make informed and planned decisions - we are not children - we can't simply apply 'knee jerk reaction decisions' just because right now we are unhappy. And we all know that divorce is a messy business, so waiting till the time is right in order to minimise 'collateral' damage seems right to me.

Yes, it does imply that you loose a little of your time on this planet - but you have comitments and don't think that the alternative (divorce) will be all roses either - so plan, prepare and wait. Patience really is a virtue.

Good luck

Wow, I really hope not. I would rather be alone and happy then spend my value time on this planet with someone I would rather not be with. Life is full or people I don't wanna be around, at work, in public, at work, again.... When I get home, I damn sure don't wanna be around someone I don't really care for. I couldn't and wouldn't do it. My life is not my child's. I, of course take her into consideration throughout each and everyday and by no mean is she neglected. However, I could be hit by a bus tomorrow. I will no way sit around and waste my life being around someone I would rather not.. especially if I don't have to.

What a miserable existence...

I mean to each their own.. but if you are the one who is working, the ball is in your court. I would send him off to his mothers or some other relatives....

Wow, nobody is suggesting counseling?

DO seek appropriate counseling. If it's not effective, find different outside help. Don't let pride and price overrule what you value the most in your life, happiness with your family. Do not continue the broken cycle. If he refuses to participate, go yourself. It can't hurt to talk to someone and it may even be able to solve some disputes. It's nice to have someone with a PhD tell you you are not crazy from time to time even though you may feel that way.

It probably depends a bit on how old you are and whether you are male or female, also what your employable skill sets are. It's not a bad idea, assuming that the two of you currently can cope being separated. I think the point is that you are planning on becoming single and independent, don't just go looking for another life partner.

Leave it'll only hurt the kids more. They can tell that there isnt love in the house anymore

I have a friend who waited til her kids moved out to get divorced...and her kids were angry that she put herself through that misery just for them. If you need to get out then get out

did you talk to your husband if he is going to work or not? if not, what is the point of waiting for that long years.