So many people told me they are coming to my wedding, but now are backing out?

It's normal for people to decline invitations, do not take it personal.

Never accept a verbal RSVP, only the paper ones count, a lot of people get caught in the moment and then when the time comes, they forget that they have appointments, family reunions, no money etc. etc.

Now, if they RSVP on paper and they backed out, that is a different story. Are you demanding cash gifts? Have expensive registry? Have a destination wedding? It is on a major holiday or middle of the week? Are you making unreasonable attire demands? Are you asking for donations, selling tickets for food or liquor? Have you said that you will not serve a meal? Do you send facebook or email invitations? Did you send your invitations too far in advance? Those are things that may turn off some guests.

ETA: Only count the once that reply on paper. I know about the Army "besties", you move away or you move away and then they forget about you and move on. Now you know who your real friends are. Weddings and funerals, that's where you know people's true colors.

Good luck

Here's some statistics . .

No matter how many people you invite to your wedding, only 80% of those invited guests who live approximately 100 miles of the wedding location will attend the wedding.

And if the wedding is 500+ miles away only 50% of the invited guests will attend.

And if the wedding is 1000+ miles away only 25% of the invited guests will attend.

I know of one Bride and Groom who planned a destination wedding at a resort on a holiday weekend. Almost 300 people were invited. When the guests found out the resort required a minimum two night stay due to the holiday weekend, this wedding went from "a big wedding" to "a small wedding" very quickly. Less than 75 people attended the wedding. The Bride and Groom saved so much money by not having to pay for over 200 dinners that they actually upgraded their honeymoon plans.

There is absolutely nothing that you can do about this situation. People have priorities, and no matter what your friends and family members told you three months ago or six months ago when the wedding invitation arrives at their home, they have to make a decision. It's their loss. Just accept it and move on.

Answered by: A Certified wedding specialist / A Professional bridal consultant / A Wedding ceremony officiant

Did you send a written invitation? It doesn't sound like you sent them anything in writing, which would have gotten their attention and respect for the event. If you send a formal invite that requires written response, the guests understand that you need a headcount in advance for the caterer, and for them to not show up would be highly gauche because you still have to pay for their meal. At any rate, the etiquette is that anyone who declines should still send a small gift so you should be getting gifts from those people. If not, then when you're invited to their weddings, you know they don't expect a gift if you decline.

it is rather rude to say they were coming along and then drop out. However you have to realise that while it may be a big thing for you, for everyone else it's just another wedding and not always the most interesting way to spend a weekend. If you are expecting them to travel a long distance, even more so.

hope you can cut down the catering.

I know its hard but stuff happens people cant get time off, kids get sick, another wedding is the same day. I do know how you feel we had a usher and bridesmaid (husband and wife) drop out three weeks before the wedding. My bff had her wedding last year. 500 people were invited 258 said they were coming and only 175 showed up. So just remember its not just you it happens at all weddings.

I would let them know your feelings! A wedding is a very important day. Also, someone's word should mean something and these ppls clearing don't so I would say that thery're not even worth the paper the invitation was written on!

Count everybody even if they don't send back the RSVPs. Most people don't send them back or call or anything. So don't think that just because they didn't RSVP that they won't show.

Don't let it ruin your day, but don't just blow them off. You don't want to just end a friendship because of that. You should maybe talk to them, but approach it with patience and sincerity. Also, when you look back on the day, is it going to be important to you who was there, or who you were getting married to?

Some may be busy and the other will be disregarding the invitation.Leave it as passing clouds

and examine ur partner for opposite attraction.

I'm with "Johns", go have a blessed day and forget them. Blow it off and while you're at it, blow them off too.Congrats.