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First Ever Attempt At Lyrics - Critique Please?

First attempt at Lyrics for me so would be interested in any critique and someone with music writing skills to write the music for it.

~Just A Lie~

There isn’t anything I’d do for you

There isn’t anything worth the time

It would take to make this better

So much less of a crime

Maybe once, or was it twice

Lies fell easily upon these ears

But no matter what you patter

Now I have only fear

Chorus

Why’d you have to whisper sorry?

Why’d you have to cry?

When I told you it was over

It wasn’t just a lie

And perhaps I was mistaken

Though why I do not know

Your eyes they carry lies

And your tears are just for show

Chorus x 2

Perhaps you should stop talking

It’s a sound I’ve heard before

Now it’s far too late to wait

To pick my heart up from the floor

And baby keep your apologies

You’ll need them later on

To be repeated when you’ve cheated

On the next girl that you con

So why’d you have to whisper sorry

Why’d you have to cry

When i said that it was over

It wasn’t just a lie

It wasn’t just a lie

When I said it was over

It wasn’t just a lie.

Update:

I'd probably say I see this as a rock ballad, but I have no musical talent (I normally write poetry)

4 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    This is actually pretty good. When I read this, I imagine it as a rock song..

  • 5 years ago

    Yes a number of, the great identified having been 17 october 1989 while there used to be a primary earthquake in California for the period of a "World Series" 3-hitter. Had it no longer occured my brother woulda been on Nightline with Ted Koppel afterwards.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    You wrote these??? wow. They're great! I totally thought for a second they were a real singer's lyrics! Great job! but what kind of music is this (If you made a beat for it i mean..) ?

    Source(s): Umm my opinion??
  • 1 decade ago

    I would so listen to this if it was a song!:)

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