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My almost four year old has taken to wetting himself...?
And has also taken to pooping on his bedroom floor.
He was fully potty trained when he was 18 months old (very quick to learn!) and for 18 months after that he was fine, he was just like any other toddler, the odd wet bed, the occasional accident in his underwear, etc.
Last September, he began at playgroup, where I leave him for the morning. He went through a phase of having accidents in playgroup, and they were as good as gold, just put his clean clothes on him and sent him off to play (I'd send him to school with a spare set of clothes just in case!)
Now it's very strange. He's clean in playgroup, clean overnight, clean when we visit friends or family, clean when out playing, etc.
He always asks to go toilet when he needs to go while we're out. (Althoug if he's really having a good time he'll deny he needs to go until the last second, but he will still tell me and get to the loo in time!)
BUT. Indoors, he'll wet himself, and at my mum's he'll do the same. He'll also poop on his bedroom floor indoors, too. Actually pull his pants down and poo on the floor!
I've tried EVERYTHING, from taking him to get checked for urinary infections (nothing) talked to him about anything that he might feel worried about (nothing) tried to be more stern with him (nothing) asking him why (he just answered he needed the toilet) tried mild forms of "punishment" (ie when he wet himself I'd take away one of his toys for a while.)
He knows when he is wetting, and when he's going for poop, so it's very frustrating-but I don't understand what's brought it all on and why he only does this at home or at my mums. He was fine for over a year, why start now?
Bigger problem, last week I found out he has been accepted in a proper little nursery school attached to a primary school. It's one of the most sought after schools where we live and little man has been VERY lucky to get a place there.
The problem is he NEEDS to clean and dry all day as it's a full time nursery place he has, rather than just doing mornings, and will also need to ask when he needs to go to the toilet and I'm worried he won't.
I know it's not the thought of going to nursery that's causing it because he was doing this before we found out about him being accepted. Plus he's very excited about going to "big boy school" bless him.
Has anyone been through this or got any suggestions on how to deal with this before September!
His Dad and I are getting married next month-having said that though, he does work very long hours bless him, he works two jobs, so he works from 8am-2pm monday-friday but then has a night job which begins at 6pm and he'll not get home until 4am. He does this three nights a week, and does include him working weekends.
He's always worked those jobs though, even before our son was born, so nothing out of the ordinary for the little fella.
6 Answers
- ?Lv 510 years agoFavorite Answer
You DONT punish him, as hard as it is and frustrating it must be.
This is a psychological matter and he needs to see a child psychiatrist.
It is not a matter of whether he can control his bladder. He has already shown you that he can. This is something goin on inside him.
suddenly having accidents and peeing the bed and doing out of the norm things having do with bowel movements (pooping on the floor) are all signs of psychological distress.
- Chibi Oka-sanLv 610 years ago
Try a harder punishment. He knows what he's doing so get onto him for it. Make him clean the mess, I'm sure a 4 year old is capable of grabbing paper towel and some soap and scrubbing the poop. I'm also sure he can change and clean himself up too. Try also time outting him for it if him (or you) if he doesn't do it (or you don't feel comfortable with his cleaning efforts). Basically time out until the mess is cleaned.
Maybe even a spanking if you beleive in them. You catch him in the act whack his behind and tell him to go to the toilet.
Other then the negative stuff remember to go back to basics a little and have him go to the potty and praise when he goes in the toilet but be stern when he doesn't.
At 4 he knows that going on the floor is wrong, so remind him in a way he'll understand.
- 10 years ago
Maybe he is scared that with the wedding he wont be as important anymore. He might just be looking for more attention. I wouldn't punish him by taking toys away or making him clean it, try time outs, they enforce thinking about what they did wrong and not what they are missing or having to deal with fecal (you have to admit that's just gross, especially for a 4 yo). Try putting it in terms that are easier for him. Don't ask why he did it because it gives the impression that sometimes it may be ok. Tell him you want to help him. Ask him what he needs. Try telling him that "mommy doesn't like it when you potty on the floor" You know your son better than anyone and you know what he responds to.
- sursumcordaLv 610 years ago
Where is his father in all this? If you are a single mother, have you recently started dating someone new?
After checking back, I think that you should have him clean up his "accidents", not as a punishment, but just as a matter of fact. When he spills his juice, don't you give him a rag to wipe it up? It's not punishment, it's learning responsibility for your actions. Don't make a big deal of it any more than you would having him pick up his toys.
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- 4 years ago
a million. purchase him some underclothes. purchase slightly potty (those are extra valuable than those you placed on properly of the conventional rest room). placed the underclothes on him. supply him quite some water and juices all day. encourage him to continually drink! 2. enable him proceed playing or regardless of he likes to do. 3. keep an intensive eye on him for right here: grabbing his crotch, being really annoying or jumpy, attempting to cover, walking humorous, holding his tummy, crying, attempting to take off his pants, and so on. 4. If he does any of the above, %. him up and carry him to the rest room, thoroughly take off his pants and underclothes, sit him down on the potty (status is not effortless until eventually they have mastered easily peeing, that is ideal to attend until eventually they're 4 or 5 to commence preparation them to face and pee). 5. ascertain his penis is pointing down into the potty (otherwise he will spray onto the floor even if he's sitting). 6. Wait patiently interior the rest room wih him so long because it takes, deliver him something to drink at the same time as he's on the potty. 7. try turning on the sink, the sounds will make it difficult for him to carry it, and stimulate his bladder. 8. Getting a small bowl of warm temperature water and dipping his palms into it at the same time as he's on the potty also enables stimulate his bladder. 9. keep him on the potty even if he says he would not ought to pass. Or tries to upward push up. 10. yet another good way is that if he gained't pass potty, and consider had him on the potty for 15 minutes, take him off, and enable him pass again to regardless of he became doing, yet do no longer placed his pants and underclothes again on. 11. keep an eye fixed on him at the same time as he's playing, he became obviously holding it on the potty and he will probable favor to pass again quickly. supply him extra water and juices. 12. because he's not wearing something, you'd be waiting to inform if he needs to pee immediately, by utilizing instinct he will grab his "wee-wee" (penis) and cry or element to it, to reveal you he's uncomfortable. 13. Take him to the potty, and sit him down, he will probable pee now. If he would not pee immediately, tell him he will sense extra valuable if he pees, because at this element he's everyday with that he's uncomfortable, attempt to make it effortless to appreciate, tell him his wee-wee will sense extra valuable if he makes use of the potty. good success :)