How can I raise the libido in my wife?

Hi Kyle

The immediate thought that comes to mind is: is she a survivor of sexual abuse? I ask, because my husband used to have this argument with me and I was molested. For me, it was the fear of rejection.

Have you asked your wife, what turns her on? Because men tend to assume they know. I have this with my husband, but he is learning lol

She could even have an hormone problems that causes her to feel un sexy, so perhaps you could encourage her to see a doctor and take a look.

Lol I am still chuckling because my husband always used to say: why don't you come to me etc and it is true, I never did. He would also say: don't just say: do you feel like making love, because quite frankly, it is a turn off - just come over and say: I want you know! Well, I am learning and I do believe he likes what he finds.

You have to talk with your wife and really ask what is going on with her. Perhaps she does not like the way you smell or even what you are wearing; also perhaps she does not find the male form that attractive, because it is very often the case, that we females do not go on quite so much about the male form as you chaps about the female form!

I take Ginkgo biloba for bad circulation and believe it or not, but it also helps sexually and does wonders for the memory!

Many herbs do this, so perhaps if it is not you personally, she could try taking some natural herbs to help her along.

Another thought: women feel rather sexy when they dress up. My husband is taking me out for a meal tonight and that alone is sexy because he just came out and said the other day: I want to take you out for a meal. This means, getting a bit dressed up and him too and I am reckoning that I know what he is going to wear - and it will be difficult to leave the house!!!

Basically if you don't discuss it with her, then she is going to be oblivious to your wants! But you have to accept that she may feel embarrassed because it is something about you personally that does not turn her on, so you have to be prepared to take that on board.

There is hope because I was really bad at one time, but now - no stopping me!!!

I do hope that you can both find a sexy way of dealing with it.

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Make sex more enjoyable for her. My libido was dead for a long time. I didn't like sex, because he, truthfully, wasn't very good. I had to tell him (in a nice way) that I needed more. He took my advice and we have a great sex life now. You would be surprised how some actual foreplay really works.

I'm the wife, and I initiate 99% of the time. I'd love for my husband to seduce me, come on to me, be spontaneous, tell me he wants me right now.

After all these years I still haven't really gotten anywhere with that.

Good luck.

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Sex is a physical AND emotional experience for women. Her libido may be low due to stress,medication or physical problems but more than likely it emotional.Maybe she doesn't feel sexy or maybe she doesn't feel appreciated by you.