I don't want to go back and don't have a plan. Would you take the leap?

yes, but it would be a leap inward.

GOING DOWN

"What is a shaman but someone who’s been there, and made it back

again. The Underworld Journey, they call it. A deliberate descent

into the labyrinth, with only the thinnest of threads to hold onto. It

comes to us all, in one way or another. Some make it - some don’t,

but it never stops. The summons keeps a calling you back. And

Down.

This is a great cycle of transformation. It has peaks, plateaux and

troughs - the movement of which you can learn to endure, and even

welcome. Change is necessity - to live and adapt and grow. Sure it’s

painful to feel madness gnawing at the back of your brain, but maybe

caterpillars feel the same way about becoming pupae - driven by a

cellular necessity into the unknown.

Our culture has left us largely unprepared for this process, branding

it a form of madness, to be banished by bright needles & the smug

self-satisfied psychologist who explains away our secret dreams,

our desires for wildness. The summons is continually being blunted

by those who would set limits on the imagination. ...”it’s not real,

only imaginary”...”stop daydreaming”...”you’re an escapist”...yeah,

right. We break from the lies, then break from ourselves, and shatter.

Not once, but again and again. Not breakdown, but breakthrough...

into where?

Doesn’t matter how long you stay down there - a week, a year, a

day - you’ll be back. Might as well get used to the scenery.

When the summons comes, you’ll know it. The journey may well

take years. You’ll meet friends and allies, be challenged, and maybe

crushed occasionally. Necessity can be a mean mutha. Remember,

never leave the boat - unless you’re going all the way. The trigger

may be different each time - crisis, drugs, gnosis, a brush with death

- these are the ways your allies open the doors for you - the risk is

entering feet first. Death is, in fact, a critical factor. You must

surrender yourself to death - lie back in her arms and she will most

likely hand you back. If not, well better luck next time.

A helpful clue is to let go, when there’s nothing else you can do.

Relinquish control. Imagine yourself hanging above a bottomless

cliff, holding onto a branch. Take a deep breath, cross your fingers

and let yourself plummet. If you’re going down, you have to go all

the way."

"Simply put, the term ‘initiation’ is the conscious recognition that

you have reached a turning point in your development. It is the

awareness that you are at this point that is the key, and the recognition

that you are entering a period of potential self-transformation."

Phil Hines

Generally I like to know where I am going before I step out. Stepping into the unknown is an action of an intrepid spirit, but that spirit first knows what it is stepping out to accomplish. If you do not have a plan, it is not yet time to step out. This goes for going back as well. You don't move from one reality to another without first establishing what you are trying to do. Otherwise you are blindly flailing rather than taking an affirmative action. Basic rules of managing; develop a plan, enact the plan, evaluate. It falls under whether you want to move forward (affirm) or backward (retreat). Accomplishments are made moving forward, even if you double back it must be reasoned to be affirmative. Establish your discipline than enact your discipline. Simply flailing about usually wastes your energy and your resources.

You say you want to allow the spirit to move you. While I too allow a spirit to move me, that spirit has earned an established record of trust. I will also assert here that not all spirits are the same and not all of them deserve trust. Many have followed spirits to their own demise. Perhaps you recall the Jones town massacre or the Hale bop suicide cult? Be discerning about spirits.

Yes for being alone and not stuck, but no for any spirit. The spirit right now wants you to act and to act in such a way that you will never be stuck again. That means money, money making, a job, self-reliance, a lot of courage. Be practical right now, that is what spirit is: a breathe, a wind that gives energy for action.

First, breathe.

Second, I don't know if I could take the leap. I'm still tied down by family. I wish I could, but I think I need to find peace within my current circumstances before I try to find it "out there."

Third, breathe, breathe, breathe ... enjoy the moment for that's all we have. There was a car accident up the street from where I live a few days ago. In an instant, a young woman's life was gone (she was thrown from the car as it hit the media speeding). You can have peace right now, right where you are.

"Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without." ~Buddha

you don't give enough information for a proper answer. but you should probably write down the pros and cons of each choice, and add everything up. take the winner to the Lord in solemn prayer. Tell him you have done your homework and you've made a choice and you need him to tell you whether you've made the right choice or not. but be prepared, sometimes His answer is "either option is acceptable. make your own choice."

I don't know anyone who successfully went back.

The journey should always be intentionally onward and upward surely? Don't you think? We are never stuck until our good health leaves us.

To go on any journey requires some form of plan/commitment or map.

You about to let Jesus take the wheel?

I honestly don't know how to answer because i am not sure what you are asking.

I would take the leap. yup.

Use your own wisdon and choose well.

OK!