am i someone that's an alcoholic?

this is a SERIOUS question and all that i am writing i ACTUALLY DO! i want to start by saying that i have been called an alcoholic and addict before! even by my parents!

i have noticed, actually for over a year now when i drink and get drunk i obsess that i have enough to get drunk and drink! or if i can't drink as much as i wanted to i get a little pissed off! or i get paranoid or anxious if i can't drink as much as i wanted to! i MOSTLY drink and get drunk alone because i have asperger's syndrome and obsessive compulsive disorder! is this normal to obsess about having enough alcohol to get drunk alone? i think it is! right now im in a financial problem so i can only spend 40 dollars a week and it is mostly on beer! =]:) but i want to drink more and get drunk more! if your wondering i am a 21 year old male! (not in college!) i also notice that when im not drinking and if people are drinking around me or are drunk i want to drink and get drunk to! it is very contagious and tempting to do that when i experience that! and yes drinking and getting drunk is IMPORTANT to me even tho i do it alone mostly!

i guess i do quite a bit of secret drinking to and my dad just said to me "i think you drink enough" and yes alcoholism runs in my family and dna! i have been told that means you have a higher chance of becoming an alcoholic! lol but that NEVER stopped me from drinking and getting drunk! lol! i also ONLY socialize when i am drunk or drinking as it helps!

i am a loner with no real friends but lots of acquaintances but that wont stop me from getting drunk!

but seriously i DISLIKE being sober and LOVE being under the influence of alcohol ALONE or alone at a bar or lounge in a crowd! and i get or feel defencive if someone like my mom or dad or anyone talk to me about my drinking!

i also have problalby have purchased over 100 beers worth of six packs and hiding it in my basement in my hockey equipment bag and work clothes and i also have a certain designated time to drink and i always ALWAYS think about alcohol and getting drunk! even when i am sober! and i do not drink everyday or get drunk everyday but i would like to drink everyday! and i think about it LOTS of being drunk when i am sober! and if i even go sober for three or four days i think about drinking and crave it and want to drink very hard to not think about alcohol going three days sober is too long for me! or long enough!

i should point out that the last four or five weeks i have been drunk pubicly but i drink to also socialize better and to forget about who i really am lol! i got drunk on monday and tuesday i was home alone and snagged some crown royal! and on saturday night at the bar i had an argument with someone (cant remember what i all said) but he took my beer from me and i started getting a little mad and talked some more and i finally had the rest of my beer in front of him he was being serious tho and i think he threatened to punch me but didn't

and i have quite a few blackouts and EVERY time it seems i get drunk which is weekly i dont remember parts from the last evening every time! and the odd time i have an eye opener! and i do not socialize unless i am drinking! and on monday i was at the lounge and people there told me i should quit drinking but i only got a little drunk! and i worked at 6:15 am and had four beers only four in two hours last friday and i had only seven or eight beers last night and a shot of jack daniels and a tequila shot hahahaha! and i have enough money to get drunk for the next few weeks and i bought a secret six pack today! most of that money is me going to be drunk! i got blackout drunk on the 23rd and on christmas eve i also was drinking secretly! i also got some cash for christmas but will be spent on beer! i also was going to buy beer the other night but it was closed so i was driving home feeling mad and irritated but i was able to get some wine from my dad and i had that fast and then some whiskey and then some bailey's i drink out of my dads liqour cabinet quite a bit!

and of course i was blackout drunk on new years!