hows this intro to my story?

This sounds part of the blurb on the back cover but it doesn't do anything for me at all. The editing is not very good because the spelling and grammar need polishing too. Is Shiela meant to be Sheila? "A young madden" should be a young maiden but even then the term "a young maiden was born" is not right. A baby girl is born and grows into a young maiden. "Her Mother took by childbirth" sounds wrong too try "taken in childbirth" and "disapperd" should be disappeared. Print it off and read it out loud and you will hear the things that need changing. Keep writing it though because it sounds as though it could be a very interesting story.

It sounds like a great description for a story, but it doesn't sound like a story itself. You're giving background information, but nothing's really going on. If you really want to keep the folklore feel, I'd suggest having a character telling this story, a wise old grandpa around the campfire explaining to Sharmila how she was born and why, or something like that.