Yahoo Answers is shutting down on May 4th, 2021 (Eastern Time) and beginning April 20th, 2021 (Eastern Time) the Yahoo Answers website will be in read-only mode. There will be no changes to other Yahoo properties or services, or your Yahoo account. You can find more information about the Yahoo Answers shutdown and how to download your data on this help page.

? asked in Arts & HumanitiesPoetry · 9 years ago

My poem for assessment: “A Dark Mystery” of the universe pondered from the seat of the camp fire.?

"THE DARK MYSTERY"

The yap of the fox breaks the still of the night

Up the canyons dark trail to the flickering light

Of camp fire burned low at the panicle height

Where the pine tops give sway in the soft autumn breeze

And firelight responds to darkness on trees

Warm blushes of orange under canopy leaves

A wonder of heavens where stars are the song

Of a beauty so perfect and time that is long

Nocturnal the witness from animal throng

Night sky the blanket a cover of peace

To ashes the camp fire the night to appease

All souls are at rest now and hearts are at ease

While in darkest of dark dwells the God of the Ark

Ten cubits apart stone walls guard the heart

Of the age and the mystery of Earth from the start.

2 Answers

Relevance
  • ?
    Lv 7
    9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    I liked the first four stanzas VERY MUCH! I can't actually put my finger on why I'm not crazy about the last stanza, except it seems to be the most off in meter (which could be easily fixed), and maybe the sudden change to the metaphorical (stone walls, cubits!), and I'm not sure, but the last line seems a little awkward. Still...You should be proud of this.

    (and maybe the last stanza is great...I'm not the best judge.)

  • 9 years ago

    I love your poem.

Still have questions? Get your answers by asking now.