If Your 5 yr. old son Wanted a Barbie Doll, Would you Give it to Him?

I had this discussion with my 4 year old tonight. Her brother is allowed to have dolls, it would not be fair for her to keep all the dolls herself nor would it be fair for him never to share all his cars and trucks. And I remember my psychology class and how we talked about this and I thought of how full of crap the theory that they don't gravitate towards certain toys IS. I already had been around enough kids to see little boys make babies into cars and trucks, and little girls to make trucks into baby dolls. My sister bought into the whole "you shouldn't encourage gender specific toys" so her son was always given baby dolls, and he was always making guns and cars out of them.

I have a 4 and a 2 year old. I have bought a bunch of cars for my daughter, a variety of clothes from the boy and girl section, love the fact that she loves Cars and Toy Story (traditionally boy cartoons.) And yet she loves to dress like a princess, wear pink, and has a billion baby dolls. My son, at about 1 year old, found one of her cars and fell in love. Her dolls did not attract him (tonight was the first time I saw him show interest in one of her dolls.) His cars talk to one another, play together, give rides to one another, give kisses and I have to give them kisses and help them if they fall. He stands and stares at cars as they drive, and gets so excited by helicopters and planes he starts shaking and turns bright red. She NEVER did that.

Both of them love real babies and are very gentle and loving towards real babies. But I've provided every toy under the sun and my son is so involved with cars and my daughter is so involved with dolls.

If my son asked for a doll, I'd give him one. I'm fine with that. I would not give him a Barbie (but I wouldn't give my daughter a Barbie either, I don't like Barbie because the doll play she encourages is "if I were Barbie..." whereas baby-dolls encourage care-giving and toddler-dolls encourage pretend-friendship play.) When he wants to wear sparkly shoes, I let him. When he wants to wear the princess hat, I let him. Just like I let her wear Cars shirts and shoes even though we've had a boy at a store say "Hey, those are boy shoes, like mine..." and his mom told him that she must like Cars like him, end of story.

But so much of this "they gravitate towards these toys because of social pressure" to me is a lot of garbage. And was supported in 2008 by studies with rhesus monkeys. I can tell you right now, there's no way I encouraged this love of cars or flying things, it started way too early and became way too focused and almost obsessive too fast. And since I HATE dolls personally (I liked stuffed animals) I definitely didn't encourage that in my daughter.

It's unfair that five year old girls can play with trucks and no one says anything but when boys play with dolls, they get called 'gay'.

My brother, unfortunately, had a sister two years older than him. He'd play dress up with me and my friends, and I played Legos with him. I don't see a problem with getting a five year old boy a Barbie then getting a five year old girl a Nerf sword. They're five, for Pete's sake!

(My brother isn't girly, in the least bit. He's unscarred from being force to wear princess dresses. He's playing MW3, before I go kick him off and play a few rounds myself.)

Absolutely.. My children <I have 2 girls and 1 boy> had access to a wide variety of toys, I stood back and allowed them to use their imaginations to decide what to play with when and how..

This lead to a Barbie in a red evening gown riding in the back of a Tonka dump truck on the way to fight a fire... A baby doll bungee jumping off the top bunk <glad my son didn't try it himself the elastic from my sewing basket wouldn't have worked as well with him on the end of it> A princess castle built from legos.. etc...

Sure why not? Its just a toy. The only worry I would have is that he would be teased at school by other kids. It's never a good idea to send your kid to class with a target like that on their backs but if more parents would stop with this gender branding of toys for kids then that would not be an issue. I'm not sure if I would want to be the mom who sets her kid up against society's norm.

Of course. I never encouraged my kids to play with gender specific toys, but my son was naturally attracted to monster trucks, and my daughter was naturally attracted to dolls. Of course they play with each others toys at times and that's ok.

Of course. My son is my son, I don't care what he plays with, as long as he's happy. Gender specific toys are ridiculous. I was a major collector of model planes and toy cars when I was little, and my brother and I were always fighting over the easy bake oven.

No I would give him one of the cheaper dolls who don't have all of the gender role stereotypes. For one thing Barbie is way too expensive and Barbie represents the traditional air headed, made up, vane, phony, barefoot in the kitchen gender stereotypes. I want my kids to respect women without bias and stereotypes.

I had a barbie doll when i was 5

but i accidentally tore its head off while spinning it over my head on one of my daily runs through the house. good times

Sure, I don't believe in gender toys anyway,

When I was little I always liked toy cars, not barbies.

Yes! If that's what they truly wanted then I would get it for him. And when I was little I would play with Lego and Kinex and I'm a girl