He can't keep a job. Love him, or leave him?

What evidence do you have that he is going to change in December? I think that is wishful thinking. If the job he is training for only pays $11/hour, what will change? Unless you are prepared to deal with this situation for the foreseeable future, you have to make a decision that this situation is not working for you. You would not be leaving him because he doesn't have enough money - you would be leaving him because he doesn't handle his finances in a responsible manner.

It sounds like he is very immature about handling money and you are not. A red flag should go up about that!! And all that debt he has would give me pause. It doesn't look like he is going to change in that respect. Are you willing to be the breadwinner for you both? And always being the responsible one in the relationship?

I know it's difficult to make the decision to leave the relationship but you will probably realize down the line that you dodged a bullet in respect to this guy.

I have a saying that works. Never trade a certainty for an uncertainty. You have a job which is rewarding and to leave would create an uncertainty. Not a good idea at the moment. I believe the problem is with you not the job. You sound exhausted and overworked so the answer is to get lots of sleep, eat well lots of fruit & vegetables reduce alcohol & caffiene and cut out junk food and fizzy sweet drinks, drink lots of water. It's like keeping your car running with regular maintenance you've got to look after your engine as well. I'm sure you'll feel better in no time and better able to cope with the stress of your job. Be kind have fun be safe

First off, in a marriage you support each other. I don't understand people who say they only need someone who can support themselves, then why get married? It's mutual understanding and support that builds up a good marriage.

"I love this man, but I am not willing to support him"

Sounds like you've already made up your mind.

You're not ready to be married.

Why did you even say yes to him then?

It seems like the only reason you haven't dumped him yet is because you want to save face and prove to everyone you're not like most women out there in this new generation that only cares about money and stability. Swallow your pride and just dump him for the exact reason we all know.

You need to wake up. This economy is not good. Business CEO's are working at hotels cleaning rooms because they lost their jobs. Students have a hard time figuring out a major because of lack of jobs. You are lucky that you were able to land a great paying job.

He's trying, and he's not purposely piling up debt from gambling, school is a good investment.

So you guys get married and then what? You have separate bank accounts? Are you going to split the costs between providing for the kids? That makes no sense to me.

Bottom line: It's painfully obvious that there are much more important things to you than just being with him. So find someone that will fulfill that need instead of making this guy feel like a loser with all this commotion on yahoo answers.

My point of view: Be thankful that he at least took your advice and went back to school. Be thankful that he appreciates our encouragement. If it was that easy to encourage him to do something, why not encourage him to go into something that will make a bit more money?

Now a days all you can get are temp job after temp job or if your lucky you'll land an $11 hour job. That's about it. Things are getting crazy. People that have not had to look for job in the past 5 years or so, just don't understand it.

Stay with him? Give him another six months but don't marry him. See if he turns it around.

Second, you're the odd one, at 25 making big bucks, no debt, and tons of savings. No one has that, not even at 50. To expect him to rise to your standards will lead to your disappoinment for sure. He might make 20 or 25k per year but don't expect more.

Lastly, I've heard it told that sometimes a man will step up and live right once he has a wife and/or kids. That's a gamble on your part. All told, this guy doesn't seem like a good gamble. Don't marry him, not yet.

Sweetie, I can't tell you to leave him or love him. It really is what matters in your heart. I can however just give you some insight to help you with your decision.

Money is important in marriage so you can have support in insurance, health care, and if you want to have children. However, love compassion and kindness are also important. Just because he doesnt meet one requirement doesnt mean you should ditch him. If he is willing to graduate and find a job then I say stay with him. If on the other hand he is just going to sit around all day not willing to do anything with his life I say ditch him. Your best bet is to wait a few years for marriage. An average wedding costs $20,000. Wait a few years and see how things fall into place. Best of luck!!

If you love him, you should give him a chance to get back onto his feet. Leaving someone because they don't have money can be seen as a little shallow, even if most of the time it's practical. If you can see that he has brains or potential, you should stick around and see how it pans out, he might surprise you.

hmmm if you have red flags before marriage? trust me marriage will make those red flags worse NOT better. maybe postpone marriage and give him more time to see if he is a man of integrity. remember never mind what a person says, look at what they do. if you love him? then wait for him. true love gives. if your in a relationship and your thoughts are ''' what can i get out of this relationship'''? then its selfishness and not true love.nothing wrong with waiting longer to see if he proves himself. but as for right now? dont marry !!

Love Him Or Leave Him

See how much progress he makes by the end of December. If hes doesnt live up to your expectations, leave him. And you are so lucky to be making over 60,000 a year. The job situation sucks where im at. Little off topic but yes make sure he is making progress.