Can anyone make sense of this situation in dating? Is he as nuts as family thinks? Says I will die before him?

Been dating 3 years a man who has said loves me enough to marry me.... but I was born the same year as his deceased wife. Now out of the blue he says he has 2 new interests. Two? He found someone on a dating site, told me her name & showed me one of her emails to him. She is 10 years younger& has been widowed 19 months. He has been a widower for nearly 5 years. I have dated him 3 of those 5 years. We got along fine, like many things...good wide variety of music; almost the same in movies; Enjoyed working out on his home exercise gym with him. While we dated if you came over the door was open most of the time, but not locked. His youngest son hates me so if he saw my car he would ease in then jump into the living room hoping to catch us only there was nothing to catch. We might be folding laundry that would be put away in the kitchen & towels for the bathrooms (3) Or sheets,pillow cases, etc. for the (4) bedrooms.

Only time we folded laundry in the master bedroom was when it was his clothing, bed sheets & towels. I stood on one side of the bed, him on the other. Yep the bed room door was shut; but only to keep the cat out, the door was never locked. But if the younger son thought we were in there, he jerk the door open and be disappointed..... again!! It got to be so funny we could hardly keep from laughing in his face. This is not to say that we didn't sit together on the couch or in the living room in different seats and watch movies or sit and hug or kiss... we did. But we're not putting the cart before the horse. This was a mutual agreement on both our parts. The rest of our adult kids wanted us to marry...even his Dad wanted his son to marry me. Why? They all said we were made for each other & made each other happy.Something neither of us had been before he asked me to date him. A few months ago, while we were slow dancing he told me he was in love with me enough to want to marry me...I thought I would die of lack of oxygen. Then he said,"but I can't lose you like I did my wife." ( we were both born the same year; she was 5 months older than me. That is not a valid reason not to marry is it? I don't think so. Actually he most likely will die before me as he has some health problems. Bipolar & seizures as well as anxiety, memory problems & nerve problems The last two are recent problems. Then he tells me he has found someone else 10 year younger. She has lots of dough is a big wig in a company,& will live a long time.Wonder who wrote up that guarantee? Then he tells me I have to leave because the woman next door (also wealthy) is bringing him supper as soon as I leave & he calls her. She is waiting for me to get out so she can come over? She is married & her husband can't walk well. Now I wonder just what has happened to us. There was nothing to indicate there was any problems. But his other son told me it was not like his Dad to lock the house down so no one could get in; but his Dad is doing it now. Claiming fear of break-ins? Yet he told me to come over one day & the door was standing open... & he's afraid of break ins?

I got there & his sons pet was nearly dead. His son lives on his own but can't have pets in his apartment. So he comes by to care for it. But now can't get in. When I saw his Dad he had a huge open wound on his right thumb in the fleshy area between the thumb & pointer finger. He had also dug his nails into the side of that same thumb. All those areas were black with infection, he never did that while we were dating. I think he feels guilty for what he's said & done because I believe he truly loves me & knows I love him too. He says he wants us to stay friends, yet if I call he won't answer the phone or even return a call. I now can't tell him anything about his Dad's home (his Dad died not long ago). I was his live in caregiver. I was his Dad's caregiver for 3 years. His Dad had said his son would be a fool not to marry me. He even tried to get him to come over before he died. He told me he he was going to tell him to snatch me up; that if I took as good a care of his son as I did him he'd have a gem of a wife. I am at a loss for what to think. His oldest son is livid that he did this to me."You gave us back our Dad and he did this to you? He don't deserve you." Even his Aunt her son are shocked, they call me their Angel. They are angry with him as well. I gave his Dad, her brother 3 more years. They know the burdens I have lifted from him & the burdens I have helped lighten for him. He even has able to put his wifes' pictures back out after 5 years & not fall apart. Me? I don't know how to feel. I am too numb with shock. I do know that I can heat blankets up, wrap them around me & shake freezing cold for hours before I collapse from exhaustion. My daughter came by after work one morning and thought she'd found a corpse..I actually get that cold even under heaps of blankets. I try to