Wouldn't you like to know the Secret to the perfect Yahoo! Answers Politics Question?

The Secret to a Perfect Y!A Political Question in 4 Easy Steps, (or 8 if you’re counting):

1) Start with an inclusive interrogative word such as:

What, Where, How, When, or Why.

1a) Then possibly add:

Do, Does, Is, Are, Were, Have, Can, Can’t.

2) Then group people together in a drastic overgeneralization. Never use the word ‘all’ because that makes the generalization too obvious. Instead use only the term most frequently used to describe this abundant group such as follows:

Liberals, Conservatives, Jews, Blacks, Muslims, Corporations, Tea-Partiers, Priests, Illegal Aliens, Terrorists, Fox News, MSNBC, CNN, Pakistan, North Korea, Afghanistan, Iran, etc.

OR

2a) Sometimes you won’t be able to think of a large but diverse section of the population to group together. That’s okay, a minor speed bump. In this case just insert one of the following:

Barrack Obama, 0bama, Sarah Palin, Glenn Beck, Rush Limbaugh, El Rushbo, Osama bin Laden, Usama bin Laden, BHO, OBL, ODB.

2b) Never use the direct title of a person such as ‘President,’ ‘Senator,’ or the like. Formalities could create confusion or possibly undermine your entire question.

3) Here is where you will want to include an absolute adverb such as:

Always, Ever, or Never.

4) Once all of these people are grouped into a nice cardboard cutout and we’re in an absolutist mindset, quickly finish your premise. The trick is to propose and have it understood as fact, thus negating it being a question in the first place.

Spend, Cut, Lie, Blame, Attack, Believe, End Up, Hate, Get, Kill, Love, Had It Tough, Taken Over, Blocked, Have in Common, etc.

4a) It’s not always required, but how about adding an indirect object such as:

America, Socialism, Communism, Fascism, Poor, Rich, Human Rights, Closeted Gays, Terrorists, Values, Environment, Abortion, Our Tax Dollars, Education, 9/11, Prisons, Defense Spending, Illegal Aliens, Muslims, Donald Trump, Same Sex Marriage, GITMO, Debt Ceiling, Our Founding Fathers, Prisoners, Working Poor, Medicare, Welfare, etc.

Simply piece together and they go like this:

“Why do liberals always hate our founding fathers?”

“When have Jews ever had it tough?”

“Why are Conservatives always closeted gays?”

“How do Blacks love Donald Trump?”

“Where are Illegal Aliens on Welfare?”

“Why is 0bama always spending on education?”

“How do corporations always end up with our tax dollars?”

Also, no one says you can’t play jazz with the ending, like:

“Why don’t terrorists get abortions… if they love killing so much?”

If you follow this simple formula you have a ‘Mr. Potato Head’ template for multiple questions. Just mix and match.

This is guaranteed to spark debate of the highest intellectual form. But don’t take my word for it.

Become a Y!A Political juggernaut yourself. Impress your friends with you narrow-mindedness and resolute, some may say stubborn, convictions. Remember, you aren’t really asking a question, you’re making a statement with a question mark on the end of it.

Don’t ever take an answer for an answer!