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My parents may be getting divorced...?
This is a really long story and would take up at least two posts so I will just cut to the chase: My mom and dad have been married for almost 30 years, and the past 6-ish years they have really not had a good relationship. I'm 17, and I have three older sisters. There has been a lot of family tension: my mom's OCD negatively affects all of our lives and my dad claims is the basis of their marital troubles. My dad is pretty much bipolar, and his anger issues also affect our lives negatively (no physical abuse or anything, but he is very mean to my mom). My dad has been living over at my older sister's house because of reasons unrelated to the marriage, and my mom does not want him to come home quite yet, because she says she wanted to unpack our house completely. So they have been fighting even more than usual lately. Tomorrow my dad wants to meet with me during my break at school (I'm in college) and talk to me without my mom knowing. My mom (who I am also much closer with, which adds more feelings into the equation) tells me to tell him that he has been verbally abusive throughout their marriage and he is mostly to blame for their problems. I hate that they are putting me and my siblings in the middle when they should be adults and talk themselves. I need help, I don't know what to do!
3 Answers
- NedzLv 69 years agoFavorite Answer
You have to be firm with both of them. It's not up to you to support one or other side, and it's unfair of them to ask you to. You may have your own opinions, but you are not privy to the whole history of things and it is not up to you anyway. Yes it affects you, but it is their problem with one another. It is wrong of them to make it your problem.
People's parents break up all the time. Fault doesn't really enter into it. If a relationship breaks down, and there's no point in trying to mend it, then the break up has to be managed as amicably as possible. Involving a child in who's right and who's wrong is just pointless as well as nasty, because the child can't do anything.
In short, don't enter into any discussions on this subject. The only things you are interested in speaking about are practical issues involving you and your siblings, and things unrelated to your parents' breakup.
- Anonymous9 years ago
They need to go to a psychiatrist - SEPARATELY! They SHOULD NOT go to a psychologist or some douche bag marriage counselor (I never met one that wasn't more messed up than their patients) OCD and Bi-polar disorders can both be treated with medication. Once they get their brains chemically balanced they'll be able to think clearly and move forward. They CAN'T talk to each other right now, can't you see every time they do things get worse!
GOOD LUCK, HELP THEM!!!!
