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Can you please review this poem?

This perfect pain,

This heartless hope

Enamours me

With its fire.

This smoking snow,

This damp desert

Designs me

A new desire.

This weightless war,

This silent scream

Contends me

With control.

This callous charm,

This wilting womb

Taints my

Innocent soul.

Thank you for reading this. :)

3 Answers

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  • 9 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Love your flow and how you make contradicting things make sense. Good job, but it is a little dark so not everyone may like it like I do.

  • 9 years ago

    This is a very elegant and comely poem! I love the "Taints my Innocent soul" Never heard of this but this is very beautiful! You did a wonderful job, get it published! :)

  • 9 years ago

    I like your poem. It has the same statement as Invictus, which I truly admire.

    Source(s): I write poetry. I love English, speech, and stories.
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