since bringing my newborn home my toddler...?

Hiya,

Oh my this can be absoloutely exhausting plus it isnt bad for you and your husband/partner for your daughter who keeps wanting to get into your bed.

From now on get her used to her room if you have a playroom ask her to put some of her fav toys in there, read her a bedtime story in her room and not yours otherwise she wont learn to sleep in her own room at night. Also when you put her down in her own bed, give her kisses/cuddles goodnight make sure shes all cuddled up warm and feels safe within her own room. Walk out and if she follows you dont say ANYTHING to her just put her back in her bed it may take minutes or a few hours but eventually she will give up and fall asleep in her own bed. Please stick with it I know because I have done this with my lil girl (twins) when she was 2 she was very clingy and refused to sleep in her own cot/bed but I tried this method and it worked a dream within a week she was happily sleeping in her own bed and my boyfriend and I got peace and quiet for the evening.

Also running down towards bedtime make sure she is relaxed and calm dont let her run around before bedtime as it gets her energy up and new bedding wont do anything I am sorry to say although it is good to get new bedding every now and again.

PLEASE try and stick with it and I really hope it works for you like it did with me

Good luck xxx

Letting her cry in her bed is very detrimental to her, but I understand it must be difficult with a baby and a toddler. also, letting her cry will make her dislike her bed even more. Try putting her bed next to yours so she is still close to you.

I want to add that she should be sleeping 11-12 hours per night with a 1-2 hour nap. Going down at 8 and up at 9 seems a little long.

Wow she doesn't get up until 9am? Amazing, you lucky thing! I think you need to be firm with her on this if you want to keep her out of your bed. Perhaps talk to her from your bed once you've popped her back and tell her a story. Or sit next to her whilst she settles back. You can be firm but kind. Tell her directly that she is not allowed in your bed as she has a bed of her own and hopefully she will stop wanting to get in with you. I don't think it will be easy, but you need to be consistent with this. She probably feels insecure due to the new baby, so reassure her often that Mummy still loves her and is just a few steps away if she needs you. Encourage her to call for you rather than her getting out of bed to get you - makes it easier to settle her back. It might be more work for you but the effort you put in now will pay off, especially when she has her own room one day. It may take a while before she stops and she might suddenly try it again later on, but being strict on this is the only way to go if you want her out. You can still be cuddly and firm.

If you choose to let her in bed with you then I think you might have to get used to it. There's nothing wrong with it and in the short term whilst your other baby is small it may be easier just to go with it. If it means more sleep for everyone then perhaps temporarily it's ok to let her in. Some children do naturally grow out of wanting to do this but there's no guarantee. Personally I've always been one to keep my boys out unless I invite them in and the same goes for their bed - I don't get in with them unless they ask me. It's only ever then for a snuggle (although I have fallen asleep a few times). I did this because my sister's eldest daughter needed someone next to her to fall asleep until she was 8 as she was in a bed with her parents as a toddler. My Mum also had this with my sister so there was no way I was going there! Good luck, hard work always pays off.

It could be unrelated to the new arrival ... maybe it's teething. Or simply a phase she would have gone through regardless of the new born.

Is it nappy rash? Colic? Does she still have a good routine? Don't put this down to bad behaviour... she's still only little and maybe you need to adjust 'something' to make her feel better and more settled?

she's only been sleeping through for about a yr - so its prob just a change in her sleep pattern. and the new baby is unsettling her. so every time she gets out of bed put her back. and allow her to help with the baby - things like passing the wipes/nappies - putting things in the bin - helps alot

try stopping her nap in the day, so she is tired and will sleep all night my son used to wake up through the night and when we cut his nap out he sleeps through again,