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restarted writing. Anywhere near professional yet?

Pyrus waited for him, long silver body gleaming, her sensuous curves demanding the touch of a firm and gentle hand along the length of her. Not wanting to mark her he stuffed his hands deep into his pockets until he reached the door, then pushed the fingerprint button which opened it, fast and silently. In ten minutes he’d be buzzing along the Northern Road, cooling wind streaming through the engine, the smell of new leather and polished wood in his nostrils. Electronically powered gates opened at the moment Pyrus’ wheels started to move, then, a streak of silver lightning, she was off and away.

Very little traffic helped make his journey faster than usual. The updated chip in the computer made it a little safer; it was able to detect the smallest potholes and stones on the road and compensated by aninstruction to the car to avoid them.. David Langden lounged comfortably in the driving seat, chewing a mint, expecting to complete his journey in less than two hours, expecting the journey to be easy and trouble free.

Update:

Still practising, but this story is a bit special since I'm writing it as a pressie for someone close, so I want it to be the best I can do, so honest opinions please.

Update 2:

-My hero is a very swish garage owner, married with two sons, in his early forties. I haven't worked out his adventure properly yet, but I'm certain there will be one, and no, it won't be romantic.

1 Answer

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  • ?
    Lv 4
    8 years ago
    Favorite Answer

    Little grammar problems, but hardly noticable. Very nice and descriptive. ;P

    Give me more. What happens?

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