My father yells at my mother to cook and clean than threatens to turn off the lights. I shake when yells.?

Question

I'm 23 yrs old. It's like my father enjoys yelling ever since I was 6 years old; We had a record player, so I was listening to music he lowered it to a point where we can't hear it. His exact words was "that's how low I want it". I put it loud enough for me to hear it and without any other notice he went to the room with a hammer not saying a word destroyed the player then walked out. 

Now he enjoys yelling his head off and threatens to turn off all the lights and throw everying out in the garbage so we can all sleep on the floor. yells at my mother for not cleaning the kitchen, sweeping, mopping, shredding paper etc. Treats her like a child too. He threatens to beak her phone in public and also snatches it out of her hands when she is talking to her sister. My mother says she is not scared of him, but I think she is. no family visit us because of him. 

I shake at times when he yells. makes fun of me because I stutter at times or mumble. When I take a shower He yells at me saying are you F'n stupid, the fan is off, It's hot in here, are you stupid, retarded, or just deaf. I get to the point where I just want to knock his teeth in. I had a fight with him once because I broke a dish by accident. I wouldn't  have broke it if he wasn't in my face yelling because a dish was greasy. everytime he would say get a job so I can get off ssi. happily I did and was enjoying it until he tells me to quit and go to college. like a moron I did. Came home to do homework.... no i had to do other things and miss out to do the homework so I quit. caught up to his plan. with the ssi check He buys dvds extra furnature and clutter for his room while I have what? Dresser, xbox 360 that he didn't even buy and destroys, and a Tv. I can't even visit family. He says I'm ungrateful, I had a life. Where? in hell, yes. When I go outside, I put my head down out of shame.

I don't even want to date because of my life. Well, I do but I worry about my mother? I heard from my half brother that our father used to hit his mother, but that was when our father was always drunk.

Theenie · Accepted Answer

It's okay to feel afraid, but you should do something. Get a restraining order against him or something, because he shouldn't be yelling at you or your mum. Maybe go to the police or a lawyer or something and see if you can get him out of your life.

Pull your mum aside, somewhere private. Maybe invite her to go shopping, only you two and talk to her saying that you feel threatened with him around, or how you feel. Explain how you feel, and if she says no, tell her what he does to you and what he does to her, and that it isn't right and stuff like that.

It's hard to get rid of people who have been in your life so long, so you should probably see a counselor or someone who can handle this stuff. Sometimes handling it on your own works, but is dangerous. So those are just SOME options out of many. I really suggest seeing a professional, though.

Anonymous · Answer

I agree, he does have mental issues. He needs a therapist's help right away and if that doesnt help I think u should look for a good paying job & save up for a new house for you and maybe your mom. Or until then maybe you can stay with a close family member. Your mom also needs to stand up for herself and tell how shes a htown woman and shouldnt be treated like a kid. Im only 13 and I dont have the same struggles you have but...I can understand where youre coming from. You should help your mom speak out too, to make things a little easier. If he smokes or drinks a lot that could be part of the problem to. Good luck anyways!!

? · Answer

Its your mom, you probable do no longer intend to make concerns any worse overall. isn't there some mate someplace which will hear? If no longer then can't you ring a help line? just to get it off your chest in case you do no longer choose for to speak on your dad, there is a few particularly good helplines obtainable which you would be waiting to apply. it would desire to be a count of purely getting by it till you progression out yet do no longer in basic terms bottle it in or that is going to explode and would desire to break your dating which contain your mom which you choose for to circumvent if attainable.

beenthere · Answer

No your mother will have to file for the restraining order herself. 

You first need to help yourself before you can help your mother. Get the hell out of there. Call social agnecies to see if there is a program that will help you get an apt.

? · Answer

Babe, your 23. You Dont have to put up with this ****. Get a job and move out you can go to a local college and stay off campus in your own place. But please, get out of there. Its not worth it honey

? · Answer

Im sorry to say this, your dad has something wrong with him, mentally, if he has been abusing you and your family, report him to the police, seriously mate, you need to do it.

Elijah · Answer

You're 23.... time to move out..

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My father yells at my mother to cook and clean than threatens to turn off the lights. I shake when yells.?

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