Question about tipping.?

Question

My brother & I had a disagreement about how much to tip - he has worked in the restaurant business for over 20 years & is a chef. The other night we took my mother out to eat my father ended up paying but couldn't go so he asked that my brother & I paid the tip. Our meal before tax ended up being $61, I pulled out my little tip card that I've had for years it gives the amount for a tip for 15% & 20%. My brother got angry when he saw my tip card and told me I should know how to do the math (math has NEVER been my strong point & don't see anything wrong with my card since I don't want to cheat anyone). I always tip 20% I told my brother according to the card that the tip should be $12.20 whenever I see change I always just round up so I would of left the server a $13 tip which I think is fair. My brother started to talk to me like he was scolding me telling me that you should never leave change (which I don't) and that it should be 20% or more which goes to show you he isn't good at math either because he thought the $12.20 was the 15% amount.
 So then he demands that I pay $10 and he put an additional $11 with my $10. 
I was just a bit annoyed because I am not cheap I think 20% is fair and I always leave a tip. Also I didn't think our server was that great. I didn't like how she just left our table cluttered she also seemed annoyed when I ordered Iced Tea. So am I wrong for just wanting to tip the average 20% for average service? My brother made it seem like I was the worst tipper ever! I have gone out on dates with guys who think that the servers shouldn't be tipped at all because its their job and I've always left a tip on the table for the server at the end of the meal.

Caroline · Accepted Answer

I can only guess he's an older brother. He sounds like a pinhead. You obviously both way overtipped and it sounds like, had you been allowed to, your tip would have been more than adequate. I typically tip 20% also but in your case I would have left 15%. 
Having a tip card is better than having no clue and I've left change before myself. Sometimes servers appreciate the change because they can use it for laundry or parking meters or what have you. Your brother needs a good smack somewhere.

SebastianS · Answer

You are the tipper Goldielocks would like, because you are JUST right.

Your brother's view of tipping is skewed by his having worked in the industry (Who does not think that everyone in his profession should make $100K and be invited to the White House for a special dinner???). Your past dates were cheap S.O.B.s. You are right.

20% is a reasonable tip if the service has been good but not exceptional. And you were being generous by agreeing to go with 20% when your server seemed kind of snippy, rude and inattentive.

Take your brother aside at some point, and tell him you do not appreciate his criticism RE this. You are quite the reasonable -- some would say "generous" -- tipper, and do not deserve his harassment and abuse. If he persists in making such an issue over tipping, refuse to go out to dine if he is going to be present.

Will i am · Answer

Your brother is an idiot.  There is a reason he has been working in food service his whole life.

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Question about tipping.?

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