What are funny insults, but with no swear words?

Funny Swear Insults

There are some classic ones here: http://www.allowe.com/laughs/book/When%20Insults%2...

My favorite, "I do wish you were on television...so I could turn you off."

1.You smell like hot garbage

2.You fell from the ugly tree, and hit every branch on the way down

3.He beat you like a geek on the street

There are just a few that me and my husband tell each other. We always play around like that...

Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

There in no I in TEAM but there is in STUPID.

Is your middle name stupid

How long have you been studying to become an idiot

They are depriving some village of its idiot.

Can't find their butt with two hands and a road map.

If brains were dynamite, they wouldn't have enough to blow their nose.

You have a face for radio.

Your face is [repeat word last said; ie: "That is really annoying." "Your FACE is annoying.".] not really funny but annoying

There are none