My life feels lost, and I feel confused and unhappy. What can I do?

Question

I am 18 and a girl, going on 19.

The situation with my life is difficult, I come from a very dysfunctional family whom I love but are very abnormal and introverted. See the problem though is that for the past 3 years its been a very big rut for everyone in the family, well currently we're coping with my aunt having cancer and being stuck out of state in another hospital. She is unable to come home currently and its been a lot of traveling back and forth. Its left everyone in a financial instability and its been a crazy amount of stress

Well since we just got my grampa out of the nursing home and only I and my 30 year old cousin are around to watch him. Technincally mostly me, I have to stay with him every night so I never get to stay in my own bed or at my house but I can't move over to his house so I just pack an over night bag. my grandmother is with my aunt (her daughter and my mom is currently with my aunt in MO too) so it just me my brother father and grampa and cousin.

My cousin takes off a lot watching him, she is unemployed and very poor. I have a job part time but after being rehired I'm already having to take off to watch my grampa because my cousin leaves him all the time. I also do everything else for my family, no one else cooks, cleans, takes care of anything household or grocery wise its always me and my cousin can't cook for my grampa because she refuses to cook anything new for him,

? · Answer

I think you should find something that you enjoy, e.g.running,drawing etc.. And do more of it!

I also think you should talk to whoever is making you feel like this and tell them you need a break.

Or just stop doing everything until someone else realises how hard you have it

Anonymous · Answer

Go to God he will heal you and show you who your true self is

Anonymous · Answer

you are good, but sometimes, you could forget about yourself taking care of others and you feel burned out. so remember to take care of yourself and than others.

Bubbly but · Answer

Also I have a job that I'm not getting paid for and I can't apply anywhere because no one is around to take care of anything but me. I am currently getting a GED but not because I'm a drop out, because my homeschool funding ran out and I am stuck. I am so tied down by family and I'm so tired like all the time. I'm recovering from Bulimia and even being tied down, everyone around me is so negative. No one is ever happy and it ruins my mood a lot I wake up to my grandfather griping every morning or my family calling me griping. I also literlally have to have a phone up my *** or I get in trouble for not answering. I'm not allowed to gripe but everyone else vents to me.   I also see my boyfriend a lot, he visits me or I visit him since we live close and after 3 months my family just acts like assholes towards him or really awkward but he's my only friend I hang out with and I'm lonely. He's also the only person I have who helps me or gets me so its annoying when my family feels too uncomfy with him around.

My brother is also allowed to  be mean and irresponsible and tell me off whenever he wants or my friends without reprimand. He's 15 and treated like a spoiled baby. He constantly brings up my eating disorder or something and he's very much a brat.

I'm tired of trying to maintain this family with a happy smile when I could be out in college or living my life or working for ME. But even if i got a new job or something, who would clean? cook? keep my grampa company or help him? Its all up to me and my mom knows this but can only sympathize.

My dad gripes because I'm not making money or I'm not in school but literally I can't fix it. I don't know what to do I feel hopeless and unhappy its almost my birthday too which sucks.

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My life feels lost, and I feel confused and unhappy. What can I do?

4 Answers