i think i have some mental disorders?!?

im 13 i self harm and i starve myself i feel so much self hate at school like everyone is looking at me and to make it worse i go home and stare at myself in the mirror which makes me wanna cut then i also feel like im not wanted, whats the point in life no one cares about me some days my parents will be really nice and we will just talk and stuff then over the smallest things my mum will flip and get so mad she told me i was fat she said every one is fed up with me i have no friends im a loner im ugly,, then my dad is a bit scary but only when he is mad, i also feel like i always think about things to deep and i just escape reality, i cant cope with school im going back tomorrow and every time i go to school i stay in the loos at lunch and break cuz everytime i try and socilize i panic and find it hard to breath i tryed talking to my mum but she dosnt understand she thinks im doing this to punish her but im not... i just cant cope with skl but i cant talk or do anything to escape this i have 1 friend i see outside of school and i told her once that i self harmed and i didnt say anything else then suddenly she told me she has all these mental disorders and she cut herself she is lying but i basically ruined her life if i hadnt told her i cut she woruld never have done it, she dosnt even have any mental disorders. just dont know if there is like anything wrong with me like depression or something :(